Bleach Baseball
by MomsDarkSecret
Summary: The Arrancar have challenged the Shinigami to a game of baseball! Teams are chosen, umpires selected and the stands are filling up fast. Who will win? COMPLETE.
1. Inning One

**Story Intro: **This story is a collaboration between Mom and Riyo, so we're both going to post it, but on different sites. Mom will be posting it on fan fiction and Riyo will be posting it on media miner. If you don't use either of these sites, how are you reading this story?

**Summary:** The Arrancar have challenged the Shinigami to a game of baseball! Teams are chosen, umpires selected and the stands are filling up fast. Who will win?

**Disclaimer:** All characters presented in this story are from _Bleach_, created by Tite Kubo and published by Shonen Jump.

**WARNING:** DO NOT DRINK AND READ!!! YOUR COMPUTER WILL _NOT_ THANK YOU IF YOU DO! TRUST US.

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**Inning One**

"Well, Yoruichi, it's a beautiful day for baseball," Urahara said. His amplified voice echoed through the stands.

"Yes, it is Urahara. I think we should see some exceptional play today. The stadium here in Karakura Town is perfect for today's match. Although it's neutral territory for both teams, the Shinigami will be the home team since they've been protecting this town from the Hollows for countless lifetimes."

"And it looks like the Hollow fans are starting to get worked up," Urahara replied. "They've got quite a cheer going on over there."

"But I think the Shinigami fans have a response to that," said Yoruichi. "The 11th squad looks to be unfurling a banner."

"What's that? It looks like you're right. Who's that on the banner?"

"Why, it's the 11th captain, Kenpachi-taicho!"

"I think they've taken some liberties with that banner, Yoruichi," laughed Urahara. "Kenpachi-taicho never looked that good!"

"Ha-ha-ha!"

Several Hollows jumped to their feet. "Shinigami suck!"

The entire 11th squad surged to their feet. "Hollows blow!"

"Why don't you announce the starting lineups, Urahara?"

"Good idea." Urahara picked up a sheet of paper. "First, the Shinigami. Leading off, we have the pitcher, Kurosaki Ichigo, our local substitute Shinigami. He's a bit of a troublemaker, wouldn't you say, Yoruichi?"

"Absolutely, Urahara, but you've gotta love that red hair!"

"Right you are! Up next is Hitsugaya Toushirou, in right field. He may be small, but this guy packs quite a punch."

"I am NOT small, goddammit!"

"He can be a little touchy, though," Yoruichi commented.

"Ha-ha! Batting third is Kuchiki Rukia, playing shortstop. I think this tough little lady is going to surprise a few folks once the game starts."

"I'd have to agree with that," said Yoruichi.

"Up forth is Kenpachi-taicho, on first. The 11th captain is a real powerhouse. I expect there will be a lot of excitement when he's at bat."

"You bet!"

"All right. Batting fifth is the center fielder, Abarai Renji."

"Another red-head."

"You have a thing for red-heads, Yoruichi?"

"Just read the lineups."

"Batting sixth is our first human player, Yasutora Sado, called Chad by his friends, in left field. This tough human can hold his own whether he's fighting Shinigami or Hollows."

"And he's done both!"

"That's right. Up seventh is the second baseman, Ikkaku Madarame, better known as Baldy."

"And we all know why!"

"Wondering if he's a red-head, too?"

"Stick to the script."

"We have a script?"

"Just read!"

"Righto! Batting eighth is Shiba Ganju, the catcher. Not a true Shinigami, but a valuable member of Soul Society."

"His sister's pretty formidable, too."

"I'll say. Finally, batting ninth, is Matsumoto Rangiku, at third base."

"With those jugs, I bet she's made it home more than a few times."

"Keep it clean, Yoruichi." Urahara picked up another sheet. "Ok, getting on to the Arrancar team. Up first is Szayel Aporro Granz, covering third base. This fellow reminds me of 12th captain Kurotsuchi Mayuri."

"Which means there isn't much to recommend him."

"Up next," Urahara said loudly, "is Nnoitra Jiruga, at shortstop. He's the 5th Espada and is always looking for a good fight."

"He should get a tough match from the Shinigami today."

"Batting third is Zommari LeRoux, playing second base. He's the strong, silent type."

"That just masks his inferiority complex," Yoruichi muttered.

"Moving on. Center fielder Yammi is batting fourth. Like Kenpachi-taicho, I think we can expect some fireworks when this big Arrancar comes to bat."

"It's not the size of the bat, but how you use it."

"Batting fifth is Stark, in right field. He may look like he's sleeping, but there's a lot of power hiding there." He paused and looked at Yoruichi. "What? No comment."

"Huh? Nah, looking at that guy puts me to sleep."

"Ok. Up sixth we have Grimmjow Jaegerjaques, the pitcher."

"Wow, that name's a mouthful. Too bad nothing else about him is."

"Batting sixth for the Arrancar is Tousen Kaname, formerly the 9th captain of the Shinigami."

"Fucking traitor."

"Watch your language, Yoruichi. This is a family show." Urahara cleared his throat. "Tousen may be blind, but he doesn't need eyes to see. After Tousen, we have Gin Ichimaru, formerly the 3rd captain of the Shinigami."

"Another fucking traitor."

"Gin is catching for the Arrancar."

"He's a catcher, all right."

"And finally, we have Wonderweiss, a unique individual among the Arrancar."

"Unique?!" Yoruichi exploded. "He's fucking weird."

"Wonderweiss," Urahara stated loudly, "is playing left field. And there you have it! The starting lineups for what is shaping up to be one of the most exciting games of baseball we've ever seen."

"You've got that right, Urahara!" Yoruichi agreed. "If you're keeping score, you might want to note down that Ulquiorra Schiffer will be managing the Arrancar team and Yachiru Kusajishi will be managing the Shinigami. For the Arrancar, Luppi and Halibel will be serving as line coach and base coach, respectively. Shunsui Kyouraku will be line coach for the Shinigami and Kuchiki Byakuya is the base coach. For umpires today, we have Kurosaki Isshin behind the plate and our three favorite modified souls, Kurodo, Noba and Lirin, working the bases."

"I am the _most favorite_ modified soul!"

"Just shut up and do the mascot dance, Kon!" Ichigo growled.

"And to round it out, we have Yamada Hanataro of the 4th squad serving as ball boy," added Urahara. "Also, if there are any injuries today, Retsu Unohana, 4th squad captain, will be fixing up the Shinigami and Inoue Orihime will be taking care of the Arrancar."

"She's a fucking traitor, too."

"Ok, that's it! Time for the game. I hope everyone is as excited as I am."

"You know I am, Urahara!"

Isshin stepped out onto the field, accompanied by a roar from the crowd. He beckoned to both dugouts. "I need the managers and team captains, please." Yachiru, Ichigo and Renji emerged from the Shinigami dugout. Ulquiorra and Grimmjow approached from the Arrancar bench. "All right, folks, I just want to go over a few rules before we get started."

"Rules?!" Grimmjow interrupted. "Baseball already has enough damn rules!"

Isshin lifted an eyebrow at him. "Oh, I think we could use a few more. First off, no _zanpakuto_."

"What?!"

"You heard me. Second, no _shikai_, _bankai_, _sero_, _resurekushion_, or flash steps."

"Now just a damn minute!"

"And for the players with more ordinary powers, no invoking spirit mediums or calling out your spiritual strength."

"What do you expect us to do?" Grimmjow protested. "Just play with our bodies?"

Ichigo smirked. "This is baseball, not your perverted bedroom pastimes."

"What did you say?" Grimmjow growled.

"But you've got plenty of time for it, batting way down there in sixth." Ichigo grinned smugly. "I, on the other hand, need to go start taking a few practice swings. I'm up first."

Grimmjow rounded on Ulquiorra. "If that orange-headed wimp can bat first, I should be batting first!"

"I am satisfied with our lineup as it is," Ulquiorra said calmly.

"But…"

Ulquiorra gave him a look.

Grimmjow backed up. "Well, let's get this thing started!" he said loudly, and stomped back to his dugout.

Yachiru bounded over to Ulquiorra. "May the best team win, Green-Eyes! Which means mine! Hee-hee!" She hopped onto Renji's back. "Back to the dugout, Tattoo-man!"

"Can't you just call me by name?" Renji groaned.

Yachiru tugged his pony-tail. "Faster!"

Renji broke into a trot.

Ichigo lifted an eyebrow at his dad. "Sure you can handle this?"

Isshin grinned. "I live to umpire." He pulled his mask down over his face. "Play ball!"

The Shinigami players jogged out onto the field and took their positions. Szayel stepped out of the Arrancar dugout swinging three bats.

"I'm sure our spectators will have noticed by now that the teams will be using aluminum bats rather than wooden ones," Urahara announced. "These players are just too strong for ordinary wooden bats, wouldn't you say, Yoruichi?"

"That's right, Urahara," Yoruichi agreed. "Wooden bats might just disintegrate at the speeds I expect to see here on pitches and swings."

Szayel tossed aside two of his bats and stepped up to the plate. "This puny human is no match for any Arrancar," he sneered at Ichigo.

Ichigo just turned the ball in his hand and leaned in for the signal. Then he nodded and turned into position. The first pitch was a breaking ball and caught Szayel looking.

"Strike one!"

Szayel gawked. "That was not a strike!" he insisted. "My strike zone is not that low."

"You gonna whine or you gonna bat?" Ichigo snorted.

Szayel scowled and crouched over, the bat held high over his shoulder. Ichigo threw a slider and Szayel swung hard. With a sharp crack, he contacted the ball and it bounced low along the ground straight at Rukia at shortstop. Effortlessly, Rukia scooped up the ball and threw Szayel out at first.

Yachiru clapped her hands excitedly. "Good job, Carrot-Head! Keep it up!"

"Geez," Ichigo muttered. "Does she know anybody's real name?"

Nnoitra strolled out of the batting circle with a superior scowl on his face. "You won't find me as easy, human," he said. "Your weak pitches mean nothing to me."

"You're as whiny as the last one," Ichigo retorted. "Why can't you Arrancar just bat?"

Nnoitra sniffed and leaned into position.

"Maybe you should crouch down more," Ichigo said. "Your strike zone's a pretty easy target."

"The size of my strike zone is irrelevant," Nnoitra said. "The ball has to pass through it to be a strike."

Ichigo wound up and threw a blistering strike straight past Nnoitra's unmoving bat.

"Strike one."

"A lucky fluke," said Nnoitra. But he crouched over a little more. He swung hard at the next pitch, but made only glancing contact. The ball rolled straight back to Ichigo and he threw Nnoitra out at first.

Ulquiorra stepped out of the dugout as he jogged back. "I'm disappointed," he said. He regarded Nnoitra without expression. "May I assume you'll do better next time?"

Nnoitra swallowed and straightened up so he towered over Ulquiorra, but his response still sounded like bluster. "I'm just getting a feel for the game, that's all."

"Of course."

Zommari stepped to the plate without a word.

"Finally," Ichigo muttered. "A quiet one." But Zommari promptly smacked the first pitch straight over Ichigo's head and into center field. "Dammit!"

Renji ran in to field the ball and Zommari pulled up at first.

Yammi stalked out of the on-deck circle waving his bat above his head. The Hollows surged to their feet with a roar of applause. Yammi acknowledged them with a wave and a deprecating smile.

Ganju jogged out to the mound. "What do you think? You want to walk this one? The next guy looks like he's asleep."

Ichigo snorted. "No way! This guy's too big to swing the bat."

"If you say so," Ganju said skeptically, and he jogged back to the plate.

"I hope you aren't about to embarrass us," Byakuya said flatly.

"Would you people just shut up?!" Ichigo growled. Scowling darkly, he wound up and blazed the ball in so fast that a cloud of dust flew out of Ganju's glove. Yammi had not even started to try to swing.

"Strike one!"

"Wow!" Yoruichi exclaimed. "I have that ball clocked at 338 mph!"

"That substitute Shinigami can really throw!" Urahara replied excitedly.

Ichigo wound up again. His delivery was a blur. This time, Ganju grunted when he caught the ball. Yammi swung, but the ball was already nestled in Ganju's glove.

"Strike two!"

"That one clocked at 348 mph, Yoruichi!"

"I don't know how he can keep throwing 'em like that, Urahara!"

From the Arrancar dugout, Ulquiorra blinked once. "You might want to try swinging sooner, Yammi."

"Ya think?!" Yammi growled. He settled into position, his eyes fixed on Ichigo.

Ichigo stared back, his usual smirk curling up the side of his mouth. Then he wound up and threw so fast that Yammi did not even have time to move. The ball knocked Ganju onto his butt, but he held it. Yammi's mouth fell open.

"Strike three, you're out!" Isshin jerked a thumb over his shoulder.

"350 mph!" Yoruichi exclaimed. "That's one hell of a fastball."

"And that's the end of the first at-bat," Urahara said. "Now the Shinigami are up. Ichigo is leading off, and it will be interesting to see how well he bats after throwing the ball that hard."

The Shinigami players jogged off the field shaking their fists in the air to the wild applause of their fans. As they ran in, the Arrancar players jogged out, except for Stark, who slouched onto the field looking like he had just gotten out of bed. Grimmjow picked up the ball as he stepped onto the mound, rolling it over in his hand.

Ichigo strolled up to the plate, his bat slung casually over his shoulder. "Let's see what ya got," he said with a saucy grin on his face.

Grimmjow wound up and delivered a smoking curveball.

"Ball one!"

"Ball?!" Grimmjow shouted. "Can't you see where his strike zone is?!"

"Yeah," Isshin said casually, "but it's gotta be over the plate, too."

Gin threw the ball back out and Grimmjow got set for the next pitch. His fastball did not fool anybody; certainly not Ichigo. He smacked the ball soundly and it screamed between Tosen's legs, bouncing out into right field. Stark fielded it and threw it in as Ichigo pulled up at first.

"I thought you said you would be able to detect the ball, Tosen!" Luppi cried from the dugout.

"I did," Tosen replied impassively. "Any player could have missed a ball moving at that speed."

"But you're not relying on your eyes!" he screamed. "You should be able to react faster! I could have stopped it." He turned to Ulquiorra. "I should be playing first!"

"You're not an Espada anymore," Nnoitra sniffed loudly. "Clearly you aren't strong enough to play."

"Shut up!"

"Geez!" Ichigo snorted. "With all this arguing, they probably wouldn't even notice if I stole second."

"Stay where you are," Byakuya said flatly from the coaching box.

Grimmjow glowered at Ichigo for a moment before drawing himself up to pitch to the next batter.

At the plate, Hitsugaya snorted. "So you finally noticed me, did you? Since you can't even keep a substitute Shinigami from hitting the ball, I should have no trouble at all. Get ready to run, Kurosaki."

Grimmjow's glower darkened and he pitched a hard breaking ball. Hitsugaya swung and made contact, sending the ball bouncing high over Grimmjow's head. Grimmjow jumped for it and missed, but Nnoitra made a neat play on the ball and threw Ichigo out at second. Zommari, who caught the ball at second, whirled and quickly threw Hitsugaya out at first.

Grimmjow barked out a harsh laugh. "So much for the vaunted Shinigami Captain. Maybe size does matter, Shorty!"

Hitsugaya tried to charge the mound, but Byakuya caught his arm. "Return to the dugout."

"But…!"

"Now."

Angrily, Hitsugaya stamped back to the dugout, muttering to himself.

Rukia walked toward the plate, swinging her bat in one hand.

Nnoitra began to laugh. "First, they have a guy so short I could step over him without my balls scraping his pointy hair, and now this little girl? What kind of team is this? Dick-less?"

Hitsugaya started to charge out of the dugout again but was retrained by Matsumoto. "Let your bat do your talking, Hitsugaya-taicho," she said.

Rukia stepped up to the plate without a word and crouched over. Byakuya folded his arms across his chest with just the faintest trace of an expression that a really generous person might have interpreted as not displeased, because no one would be so wild as to suspect him of actually smiling.

Grimmjow wound up and pitched a fastball. Rukia's bat snapped around so fast it was a blur. With a sharp crack, she sent the ball sailing deep into left field, where enthusiastic Shinigami fans surged up to catch it.

"Home run!" Urahara shouted. "Rukia puts one out on a single pitch!"

"Now that's what I'm talkin' about!" Yoruichi responded excitedly.

The Shinigami fans were on their feet, shouting wildly and chanting Rukia's name. Rukia waved a hand as she rounded the bases, a satisfied smile on her face.

"And just like that," Urahara said, "we have our first score of the game. The Shinigami are now leading one to nothing."

"And with Kenpachi-taicho coming up to bat, that could change quickly," said Yoruichi.

Kenpachi marched up to the plate with his trademark grin plastered on his face. "Why don't you throw me one of those fastballs, Boneface?" he said gleefully. "You'll be looking for this ball out of town."

Grimmjow scowled, rolling the ball repeatedly between his fingers. He studied the signals he was getting from Gin and finally nodded. He stepped back, paused for a moment, and then threw in a slow breaking ball. Kenpachi, obviously expecting something faster, swung and just barely made contact. The ball floated out into center field, where it was caught easily by Yammi.

"Damn!" Kenpachi muttered. "That's trickier than I thought."

"And that's the end of the first inning," Urahara said. "We've gotten off to a pretty exciting start, wouldn't you say, Yoruichi?"

"Absolutely, Urahara. I think we're going to see some spectacular baseball today."


	2. Inning Two

**Inning Two**

"Takoyaki! Get your takoyaki here!"

"Hey, Jinta!" Yoruichi called. "Toss a couple of those up here."

"You better pay for these!"

"Just toss 'em, you little twerp!"

Jinta took three sticks out of the warmer box hanging over his shoulder and rifled them directly at Yoruichi's face. She caught them neatly between the fingers of her right hand. She waved the snack in front of Urahara's face. "And I ain't sharing, either," she crowed.

Urahara straightened the hat on his head. "While my co-announcer stuffs her face, let's review the scoring from the first inning. The Shinigami are ahead one to nothing on Kuchiki Rukia's home run. With the bottom half of their lineup coming up, one wonders how the Arrancar team plans to match that."

"Boo! Hiss!" several Hollows shouted. "The announcers are biased! There should be a Hollow announcer in the booth!"

"Shut up!" Yoruichi shouted back, spraying bits of takoyaki on the first few rows of spectators sitting under the announcers' booth. "He's just stating a fact."

"You're more biased than he is!"

"You want me to come over there and pound my bias into your chest hole?!"

Urahara patted Yoruichi's arm. "Let's try to maintain a level of decorum in the booth, shall we?"

Ururu dashed over to the Hollow section of the stands with a box of drinks balanced on her head. The Hollows' grumbling subsided as they grabbed drinks from the box and settled back into their seats.

"All right," Urahara said, "it looks like the second inning is about to get underway. The Shinigami are back on the field and Ichigo is set on the mound. The next batter is Stark. He's an easygoing fellow, but I bet we'll see some sparks now that he has a bat in his hands."

Stark strolled up to home plate using his bat as a cane. He yawned and waggled the bat at Ichigo. "Let's make this quick, eh?"

Ichigo scowled. He leaned in for the sign, nodded, and threw the first pitch. Stark swung and missed.

"Strike one!"

Smirking, Ichigo set up for the next pitch. He smoked in a fastball.

"Ball one!"

"What the hell do you mean, ball one?!" Ichigo protested. "It was right over the plate!"

"You missed outside."

"Are you blind?!"

"Play ball!"

Muttering to himself, Ichigo got set. He pitched and Stark smacked a screaming ground ball down the third base line. Matsumoto dove for it and managed to snag it on the tip of her glove, but the throw was late. Stark just beat it to first.

"Safe!" Lirin cried, flaring her little wings decisively.

A cheer went up from the Hollow crowd and the Shinigami spectators groaned.

"Dammit!" Ichigo snarled.

"Don't let them rattle you, Carrot-top!" Yachiru called from the dugout. "Stay focused!"

"Call me Ichigo, dammit!"

Grimmjow approached the plate swinging his bat. His grin hovered somewhere between a glower and a maniacal gleam. He raised his bat, making small circles with the tip as he waited for the pitch. Ichigo threw a breaking ball and Grimmjow got his bat under it with a sharp crack. The ball flew over Kenpachi's head and bounced into right field. Hitsugaya had to run in for it and Grimmjow kicked it into high gear. Halibel swung her arm rapidly in a circle and Grimmjow pounded around the turn, churning for second at full speed.

Stark had gotten a slow start off first, but now he tried to make up for it by pushing into the turn at third and heading for home. But Hitsugaya never slowed down. He played the ball at a dead run and threw for home in full stride.

"Hold up!" Luppi shouted from the coaching box.

Stark pulled up and scrambled back for third as the throw came in. Ganju, in position by home plate, caught the ball neatly just inside the plate above the third base line.

"Did you see that, Urahara?" Yoruichi exclaimed. "That throw was perfect!"

"Absolutely right on target!" Urahara agreed. "The runner made the right decision to stop at third."

"You don't expect to see that kind of power from such skinny arms," Yoruichi said.

"Skinny arms?!" Hitsugaya shouted from right field. "I do not have skinny arms!"

"Quit whining," Ichigo snapped. "They go with your skinny little body, Toushiro."

"I am not skinny! And don't call me Toushiro!"

"The Shinigami look to be in trouble here, Yoruichi," Urahara said. "There are runners on second and third with no outs. The Arrancar could put up a lot of runs if Ichigo's not careful."

"Don't underestimate him, Urahara. That kid's got a few tricks up his sleeve."

"Next at bat is Tousen Kaname," Urahara continued. "This former Shinigami Captain can be a formidable opponent."

Tousen stepped up to the plate and took a few easy swings. "I may not be able to see, Kurosaki," he said, "but I can sense the ball turning over in your hand."

"You trying to psych me out?" Ichigo snickered. He wound up and pitched a fastball right down the middle. Tousen let it go by.

"Strike one!"

"Impressive," Tousen said blandly.

"Liked that, did you? Try this." Ichigo fired in a curveball that made such a wide arc that everyone was astonished when it curved in over the plate. Tousen again failed to swing.

"Strike two!"

"You seem to have some moderate skill as a pitcher," Tousen said.

Ichigo snorted. "You think so?" He stood still and faced the plate, the ball hidden behind his back. He lifted an eyebrow at Ganju and Ganju grinned. Ichigo's wind up and delivery looked identical to his fastball, except that when the ball left his hand, it was barely moving. The ball came in high and broke just in front of the plate, dropping through the strike zone just as Tousen swung. He missed.

"Strike three! You're out!" Isshin hooked a thumb over his shoulder.

Tousen gripped his bat by the barrel and stalked back to the dugout.

"I told you," Luppi growled to Ulquiorra. "It's stupid to have a blind guy playing baseball!"

Ulquiorra blinked once. "Are you calling a decision of mine stupid?"

Luppi paled. "Ah… No… I meant… Oh, never mind!" He retreated to the far end of the dugout.

"That's Ichigo's second strikeout and the first out of the inning," Urahara announced. "At bat is Gin Ichimaru, another former Shinigami Captain."

Yoruichi mumbled something that sounded like "dickhead traitor" under her breath.

"What's that, Yoruichi?"

"Nothing!" she said quickly. "I was just ordering a drink. Ururu! Over here!"

Gin came up to the plate with his ever-present grin on his face. "Good to see ya again, Ichigo. I trust ya'll are doin' well." Ichigo just scowled in response. "Still as courteous as ever, I see." He settled into his batting stance, but as soon as Ichigo started his wind-up, he slid his right hand down the barrel of the bat and turned toward the mound.

"Bunt!" Matsumoto shouted, and Rukia and Ikkaku dashed forward. Grimmjow and Stark took huge leads from their respective bases, ready to run.

It was too late for Ichigo to alter his delivery. He threw a high breaking ball and Gin caught it with the middle of the bat, sending the ball bouncing straight back toward the mound. Gin took off with his bat in his hand and Ichigo raced for the ball. He scooped it up bare-handed and flung it home without even looking. Ganju snatched the ball out of the air with his glove and swept it across the base path just in time to catch Stark's leg before his foot hit the plate.

"He's out!" Isshin sliced the air with his fist.

The Shinigami crowd went wild. "Ichigo!" they screamed. "Way to play the ball! You're the man!"

A huge groan went up from the Hollow side of the stands.

"The situation's gotten a bit dicier for the Arrancar," Urahara said. "With runners at first and third, they need a solid hit from the next batter, who is…" Urahara glanced down at his sheet and pinched his lips together to keep a straight face, "Wonderweiss."

"No!" The roar of despair from the Hollows echoed around the stadium.

Tousen shoved Wonderweiss in the direction of home plate. "Go that way."

"Wah?" Wonderweiss wandered toward the plate.

"Stand like I was standing," Tosen said.

Wonderweiss stood beside the plate with the bat held in front of him and pointing straight up. Ichigo threw the first pitch and he watched it go by. "Awahhh!"

"Strike one!"

"The bat!" Grimmjow screamed from third. "Swing the bat, you idiot!"

"Uhw?" Wonderweiss looked up at the bat and swayed it back and forth. The next pitch zoomed by unnoticed.

"Strike two!"

"Augh!" Grimmjow tore at his hair. "Swing at the ball!" He shouted.

Wonderweiss blinked at Ichigo. Ichigo threw in a high, hard one. Wonderweiss waved the bat in the air.

"Strike three! Side's out!"

"No!" Grimmjow wailed. Dejectedly, he jogged toward the dugout.

Ganju turned Wonderweiss and shoved him back toward his own dugout. "Maybe he doesn't know what the ball is," he said to Isshin.

"Possibly." Isshin stepped around to sweep the dust off the plate.

"Well, that was certainly exciting," Urahara said, "but the Arrancar ended up with no runs scored after a strong start. Let's see how the Shinigami answer that threat. First up is Renji. You still got something for the redhead, Yoruichi?"

Yoruichi stared dreamily at Renji. "Too bad the uniform covers his tattoos. There's something about those black lines that just makes you want to trace them with your fingers, or maybe with your…"

"All right!" Urahara interrupted loudly. "It looks like Grimmjow is ready to take on the Shinigami batter."

"I've been watching you throw," Renji said to Grimmjow. "You're new at this, aren't you?"

Grimmjow scowled. He shook off the first sign from Gin and then nodded sharply at the second. He settled into his stance, glaring at Renji. Then he flowed into his delivery, blazing in a fastball. Renji swung hard, trying to crush the ball, and popped it up. The ball floated out into center field where Yammi caught it easily.

"Shit!" Renji grumbled, and he slowed down to a jog as he approached first. As he looped around the coach's box back toward the dugout, Byakuya looked at him. There was just the slightest downward tilt to the inside of his eyebrows and Renji flinched. "I'll get a hit next time," he said quickly.

"That would more closely meet my expectations of someone of your rank," Byakuya replied.

Renji plopped down on the bench next to Ichigo. "Dang it! I wish he would just hit me. I hate it when he talks like that."

Ichigo snickered. "You like getting pounded by Byakuya?"

"Are you implying something, brat?"

"I'm just sayin'…"

"Shut up."

"Look, Chad's batting," Ichigo said innocently. "Let's see how he does without powering up."

In fact, Chad did just fine. After watching the first two pitches go by, he smacked a solid single into center left. He turned the corner at first, but then jogged back when Yammi fielded the ball.

"Good hit," Byakuya said.

"Yeah," Chad replied.

"Way to chatter out there!" Matsumoto called. "But try to tone down the enthusiasm."

Ikkaku walked to the plate swinging his bat behind his head so that his uniform stretched tight across his chest, revealing his well-defined musculature.

Seated in the stands, his close friend Ayasegawa sighed. "Isn't he magnificent? Too bad he's wearing a shirt. His bare chest is so beautiful."

"You got a thing for him?" the Shinigami in the next seat smirked.

"I appreciate anything beautiful," Ayasegawa said archly.

"Even when he's all covered in sweat from fighting?"

"Covered in sweat…" Ayasegawa's eyes lost focus. "His skin gleaming with moisture… His hard muscles bulging underneath… Stiff and smooth and relentless…"

"You're still talking about his chest, right?"

"What?! Yes! Of course! Watch the game!"

Ikkaku faced Grimmjow with a grin on his face. After two balls and a strike, his grin got even wider. He went for the next pitch, but hit a grounder just inside first. Chad broke for second as soon as Ikkaku swung and was thus in the way of Zommari making a play on the ball. Tousen had to play it, so Grimmjow dashed over to cover first base. He caught the ball from Tousen and tapped his foot on the base half a stride ahead of Ikkaku.

"Out!" Lirin cried.

"Damn!" Ikkaku growled. He jogged back to the dugout, pointedly not making eye contact with either Byakuya or Kenpachi.

"That's two out with a runner on second for the Shinigami," Urahara announced. "The next batter, Shiba Ganju, will need to do more than just move the runner over."

Grimmjow squinted at Ganju. "You're not a Shinigami," he said. "You'll be easy."

"You're a lot of talk," Ganju replied. "But you haven't impressed me yet."

Grimmjow scowled. He delivered a smoking fastball.

"Strike one!"

Feeling cocky, Grimmjow tried another fastball. Ganju hit it solidly and the ball screamed between first and second. Stark, moving surprisingly fast for a guy who had looked sound asleep a second before, ran for the ball and threw it in before Chad could do more than round third. Ganju ran the ball out at first as the returning ball was snagged by Zommari.

"The Shinigami don't look like they want to go down easily, Urahara," Yoruichi said.

"It looks that way with runners at first and third, and two outs. Let's see if Matsumoto can bring the runners home."

Matsumoto walked to the plate with the top three buttons of her uniform undone, revealing ample quantities of smooth, round, jiggling bosom.

Isshin blinked. "Perhaps you should have asked for a larger uniform."

"This one fits just fine," Matsumoto replied.

"Quit staring at her tits, pervert!" Karin shouted from the stands.

"Um, batter up!"

"How am I supposed to get the ball in the strike zone with those things in the way?" Grimmjow complained. "If I hit 'em, it doesn't count."

Matsumoto thrust out her chest. "Are these too big for you to handle, little man?" Grimmjow glared and leaned in for the sign. He threw a curveball and Matsumoto hit it right between his legs and up the middle. Chad scored easily, to the roar of the Shinigami crowd, and Ganju made it to third. Matsumoto rounded first, but trotted back when Yammi threw the ball in. She smiled sweetly at Grimmjow. "I guess whatever's hanging in your little sack wasn't too big to get in the way of the ball."

Grimmjow picked up the talc bag and mashed it furiously, puffing out a cloud of white around his hand.

Gin trotted out to the mound. "Calm down, don't let her get to ya."

"My balls are not tiny!" Grimmjow muttered.

"I know," Gin drawled with a grin. "Now would ya please get the next batter out before anyone else scores?" He trotted back to home plate.

"We're back to the top of the Shinigami lineup," Urahara said. "I'm sure Ichigo would love to bring another run home."

Ichigo came up to the plate smirking. "You don't seem to be able to handle the girls, Grimmjow. You must like boys."

Grimmjow clenched his fist around the ball but managed to keep his mouth shut.

"Oh, he's man enough for ya, pretty boy," Gin chuckled.

"You sayin' that from personal experience?" Ichigo shot back.

"Play ball!" Isshin shouted.

Grimmjow started with a curveball and Ichigo let it go by.

"Ball one!"

Next came a breaking ball and Ichigo just sneered as it went by.

"Strike one!"

Another curveball.

"Ball two!"

"You're curveball sucks," Ichigo said. "You should stick to the pitches you can get in the strike zone."

"That's it!" Grimmjow shouted. He wound-up and delivered a screaming fastball. Ichigo punched it into center field with a resounding crack. "Goddammit!" Grimmjow screamed.

In center, Yammi back-pedaled at first, and then turned and ran for the fence, watching the ball over his shoulder. Right at the wall, he jumped and caught the ball on the tip of his glove. The Hollow spectators came to their feet with a roar.

"Crap!" Ichigo, nearly all the way to second, skipped to a halt. He turned to jog back to the dugout.

"If you had pulled the ball more toward left," Byakuya said expressionlessly, "it would have gone out."

"I'll get it next time," Ichigo said smugly.

Grimmjow gritted his teeth as he stomped into the Arrancar dugout. Ulquiorra regarded him with vague disappointment, although it's possible he was in a screaming rage and on the verge of punching Grimmjow's lights out. It's hard to say. The expressions are very similar.

"I had not planned on using another pitcher," Ulquiorra said.

"I can handle it," Grimmjow snapped.

"The score does not reflect that."

"We'll make it up!"

"I hope so." Ulquiorra glanced at the other players. "It will make me very unhappy if we lose to the Shinigami."

There was a general shift in the dugout as everyone looked for seats at the farther end.

"And that's the end of the second inning," Urahara announced. "The Shinigami have increased their lead to two to nothing. But the Arrancar looked strong and I think we'll see a scoring change in the next inning. What do you think, Yoruichi?"

"I think Ichigo's right. I think Grimmjow prefers boys."


	3. Inning Three

**Inning Three**

"Well, the Arrancar have got to be pretty disappointed about their last at-bat," Urahara said. "I think we all expected them to come away with some runs, but the Shinigami are leading two to nothing."

"That's because the Shinigami are better," Yoruichi said.

"Let's try to keep it objective in the announcer's booth, Yoruichi."

"Yeah, whatever."

Urahara cleared his throat loudly. "We're back at the top of the Arrancar lineup. Szayel grounded out in his last at-bat."

Szayel stalked up to the plate with a sneer on his face. "I have your number now, human. I'm ready for you."

Ichigo just snorted. He wound up and blazed in a fastball. Szayel jumped on it, hitting a grounder up the first base line that was just beyond Kenpachi's reach.

"What are your doing, Ken?!" Yachiru shouted. "You're supposed to stretch for those!"

Ken tried not to look embarrassed. "It caught me by surprise! I didn't expect that pink-haired pansy to actually hit the ball."

Yachiru pouted. "What's wrong with pink hair?"

"That's not what I meant!" Ken said quickly, waving his hands. "Pink hair is great!" He threw a quick glance at Szayel, who was staring at him speculatively. "On girls!" he added hastily.

Ichigo scratched his head. "Does Kenpachi actually know the difference between boys and girls? I thought he only understood the difference between fighters and non-fighters."

"Don't insult my captain!" Ikkaku shouted. "He can tell the difference between good fighters and bad ones."

"That doesn't really clarify the boy-girl thing," Ichigo pointed out.

"I can tell the difference between boys and girls!" Kenpachi interrupted loudly. "Girls are usually weaker than boys."

"Oh, really?" Rukia said calmly. "Then how come I've hit a home run but you haven't even been on base?"

"That has nothing to do with strength!" Ken howled.

"So skill matters more than strength?" Rukia asked innocently.

"No! It does not!"

"Batter up!" Isshin interrupted. "Play ball!"

Nnoitra stepped out of the batter's circle, swinging three bats confidently. He casually tossed two of them aside, and one of the bats flew down the sideline and brained Luppi in the coach's box. He went down like a felled tree.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Grimmjow shouted. "He's on our team!"

Orihime scurried out of the Arrancar dugout.

"Orihime!" Ichigo shouted. "Just let him bleed, dammit!"

"I can't!" Orihime said. She dropped down on her knees by Luppi, who was holding his head and blinking cross-eyed. "Hold still," she murmured, and a golden glow briefly surrounded him.

After a moment, the glow faded and Luppi pushed to his feet. "Watch what you're doing, idiot!" he shouted at Nnoitra.

Nnoitra shrugged. "Sorry." He stepped up to the plate as Orihime scurried back into the dugout. He crouched over, squeezing his rather large strike zone down to something a little tighter.

Ichigo wound up and pitched a breaking ball.

"Ball one!"

Ganju threw it back and Ichigo scowled. He shook off a couple of signs and then prepared for the next pitch. He threw a slider and Nnoitra smacked it into left field. Chad played it on the bounce and threw it in as Szayel rounded second. He pulled up and hurried sedately back to the base as Nnoitra skidded to a halt just past first.

"Ichigo!" Yachiru called from the dugout. "You're pitching like that bone-faced Arrancar! Get somebody out!"

"What did she say?" Grimmjow growled.

Zommari marched up to the plate with a superior expression on his face. Ichigo scowled at him.

"The situation looks threatening again for the Shinigami," Urahara announced. "Two on and no outs, with Zommari Leroux coming to the plate. Zommari got a solid single in his last at-bat."

"That will just make him over-confident," Yoruichi said. "I still say he has an inferiority complex bigger than Kenpachi-taicho's hair."

"Here's the first pitch," Urahara said, pointedly ignoring his co-announcer.

Zommari watched the first two pitches go by, both balls. He swung hard at the third pitch and missed. Ichigo smirked as he rolled the ball over in his hand. He threw the exact same pitch and Zommari hit it just as both runners took off, but it rolled within easy reach of Kenpachi. The big captain scooped it up without even taking his foot off the base. The runners stopped at second and third.

"Zommari moves the runners over," Urahara said. "Let's see what the Arrancar can make of this opportunity."

Yammi stepped out of the on-deck circle and the Hollow crowd roared with excitement.

Byakuya signaled timeout to Isshin and strolled out to the mound. "Their biggest batter is up next," he remarked.

"Yeah, so what?" Ichigo snapped.

"First base is open."

Ichigo's eyes narrowed. "I'm not walking him!" he snarled. "I can get him out."

"Why risk it?"

"The next guy made contact, too," Ichigo pointed out in a low growl.

"A valid point," Byakuya agreed.

"So what the hell are you bugging me for? Or did you just want to flirt?"

Byakuya blinked. "Teenage loudmouths don't appeal to me."

"Ichigo!" Renji shouted from center field. "Quit flirting with my captain and get to work!"

"I'm not the one who's flirting!" Ichigo shouted back. "It's not my fault if he's got a thing for me."

Byakuya crossed his arms. "I can see there's no talking to you. Pitch to him if you want to." He went back to the coach's box.

"Finally!" Ichigo muttered. He settled into position and looked in for the sign. Yammi fouled the first pitch into the right field stands. He fouled the second pitch into the left field stands. He popped up the third pitch and it went just foul behind the plate. "What is this crap?!" Ichigo growled. He shook himself. He drew a deep breath and reseated the cap on his head. "Now then…"

Three more pitches and three more foul balls. Byakuya shifted his weight slightly. Ichigo noticed.

"Don't give me that crap!" he shouted at Byakuya. "I'm doing my best!"

Byakuya lifted an eyebrow.

"If you think it's that easy, you get over here and try it!"

Byakuya crossed his arms.

"Goddamit!" Ichigo smoked in a fastball so hot that Ganju was knocked on his butt. Yammi swung hard, but too late.

"Strike three!"

The edge of Byakuya's mouth lifted very slightly.

"Ichigo responds well to negative motivation," Urahara noted.

"He responds pretty well to positive motivation, too," Yoruichi said without thinking.

Urahara looked at her. "Is there something going on here I should know about?"

"What?! No!" Yoruichi sat up straight and grabbed her microphone. "Sleepyhead is stepping up to the plate for the Arrancar," she announced loudly. "He got a single last time."

"Stark," Urahara said, still eyeing Yoruichi suspiciously, "outran a long grounder down the third base line in his first at-bat. He moved a lot faster than one might expect for such an easy-going fellow."

Ulquiorra spoke from the dugout. "Stark," he said flatly. "Get a hit."

Stark rolled his eyes. "Fine, but I'm not running. That was exhausting last time." He crouched over. "Let's not take too long, eh?" he called to Ichigo. "There's a nap in the dugout with my name on it."

"Lazy sonuvabitch!" Ichigo muttered. He threw a slider and Stark punched it. Chad just stood there and watched the ball fly over his head and deep into the left field bleachers. The Hollow fans erupted into wild cheers and there was a mad scramble for the ball. Ichigo's mouth fell open.

"Well," Byakuya remarked. "I guess you were right about which batter to fear."

"Oh, shut the fuck up!"

Stark slouched his way around the bases and accepted high fives from his teammates when he returned to the dugout.

Ulquiorra nodded slightly. "That was acceptable."

"I live to please," Stark replied. Then he grinned. "Well, if it doesn't require much effort on my part, anyway.

Grimmjow swaggered up to the plate and pointed at the scoreboard. "Looks like we're on top now, human," he crowed.

"That's not your usual position, is it?" Ichigo sneered.

Grimmjow scowled. "Just pitch the ball!"

Ichigo threw a fastball and Grimmjow swung hard. The ball popped straight up.

"Got it!" Ganju shouted and he snatched off his mask. He stared up, angling toward the backstop and caught the ball with room to spare.

"Out!" Isshin cried. He hooked a thumb. "That's three! Side up!"

Grimmjow smacked his bat into the ground. "Shit!"

Gin jogged out to the plate carrying Grimmjow's glove in his free hand. "Here ya go." He tossed the glove to Grimmjow. "We got the lead now, so stay sharp."

"Right." Grimmjow shoved the glove onto his hand and jogged out to the mound. Isshin handed Gin the ball and he tossed it out to Grimmjow.

"Batter up!"

"Hitsugaya-taicho is leading off the third inning for the Shinigami," Urahara announced. "People are prone to underestimating him because of his small stature, but the 10th division captain is extremely tough."

"Why does everybody keep harping on my size?" Hitsugaya growled. "I'm big where it counts."

"Oh, really?" Yoruichi perked up. "How big might that be? Use centimeters."

Hitsugaya slapped his forehead. "I'm talking about my released _zanpakuto_!"

Yoruichi grinned. "You can release your _zanpakuto_ around me anytime, little man! You're cute!"

"Why do I have to put up with this shit?" Hitsugaya muttered. He stepped up to the plate and jumped on the first pitch, smacking a screaming line drive past second base. Zommari dove for it and missed. Yammi ran in to play the ball and Hitsugaya reluctantly pulled up at first.

"Well," Yoruichi said brightly, "I guess that hit shows that it's not the size of your bat, but what you do with it that counts."

"Right," Urahara said. "Rukia is up next. She scored the first run of the game with a decisive homer over the left field wall."

Like last time, Rukia said nothing as she stepped up to the plate. Grimmjow scowled at her briefly before winding up for the first pitch. He threw a changeup. Rukia started to swing, but then pulled back.

"Strike one!"

Rukia pursed her lips, blinked once at Isshin, and then resumed her stance. The next pitch was a slider outside and she caught it with the tip of her bat. It bounced slowly out to Szayel at third and he played it cleanly. Hitsugaya pushed hard for second, but the throw beat him. Noba sliced his little arm down firmly. "Out."

Rukia could not beat the throw to first and Lirin waved her out rather casually.

"A clean double-play by the Arrancar infield puts the Shinigami into a two-out hole," Urahara announced. "Next up is Kenpachi. Let's see if the big guy can make contact this time."

Kenpachi lumbered up to the plate, his usual maniacal grin splitting his face.

"Do something impressive, Ken-chan!" Yachiru shouted.

"Just watch!" Kenpachi replied confidently. He took a few easy swings, still grinning widely. The first pitch was a breaking ball and he let it go by.

"Ball one!"

"See!" Kenpachi exclaimed. "I knew that pitch was no good."

The next pitch was a fastball that blazed straight through his strike zone.

"Strike one!"

"Ken-chan!"

"Don't worry! I'm starting to get a feel for it."

The next pitch was another breaking ball, but this time Kenpachi swung. He missed.

"Strike two!"

"I thought you said you were getting a feel for it!" Ichigo complained. "That was the same pitch you let go by before!"

Kenpachi glowered at Grimmjow. "The next one's not getting by!" he declared loudly.

Grimmjow's grin was almost as maniacal as Kenpachi's. He wound up slowly, the ball behind his back, and then pitched a knuckleball. Kenpachi started to swing, but his eyes went round with astonishment as the flight of the ball seemed to defy gravity. He tried to hold up.

Gin jumped up and pointed at third base. "Call the swing!"

Kurodo sadly nodded. "It's a swing."

"Strike three!" Isshin cried. "That's the end of the inning."

Dejectedly, Kenpachi slumped back to the dugout.

"That wasn't impressive, Ken-chan."

"But did you see what that pitch did?" Kenpachi grumbled. "He had to have used some bizarre Arrancar power to make it go up and down like that."

"Haven't you ever seen a knuckleball before?" Renji said. "Sheesh!"

"Well, Yoruichi, that was an exciting inning," Urahara said. "The Arrancar scored three unanswered runs and have taken a 3-2 lead. The two teams look pretty evenly matched."

"It appears that way, Urahara. The Shinigami need to come out strong in the top of the fourth if they want to keep this thing from slipping away."

In the stands, Karin nudged Ishida. "Don't you wish you were out there? It looks like fun!"

Ishida pushed up his glasses. "Playing a game like this is beneath me. I prefer to expend my energy on intellectual or spiritual pursuits."

"You're a fuddy-duddy, Ishida," Karin declared.

"No he's not!" Yuzu said. "He's just very serious." She beamed admiringly at Ishida.

"Serious is just another term for fuddy-duddy." Karin lifted her chin knowingly. "Anyway, I bet you don't even know how to play baseball."

Ishida frowned. "Of course I know. Everyone knows how to play baseball."

"Ok, then explain the infield fly rule."

"What?!"

"If you know baseball, you have to know the infield fly rule."

Ishida blinked rapidly. "Well, uh, that's where, umm, a fly ball is hit, and, umm, well…"

Karin grinned wickedly. "There's a little more to it than that."

"I'm just coming to that!"

"You're not being fair, Karin," Tatsuki said. "No one understands the infield fly rule."

"I do!" Karin replied archly.

"I do, too," Yuzu added.

Tatsuki flushed. "Well, I don't, so there's no reason why Ishida should have to."

"Don't equate me to you!" Ishida snapped.

Tatsuki bristled. "You got a problem with being equated to me? I can whip your pussy butt anytime, arrow boy!"

"Hah!" Ishida barked. "Not a chance! You think a few karate kicks can overcome my tremendous spiritual power?"

"In a heartbeat, wimp!" Tatsuki jumped to her feet and pointed an unwavering finger between Ishida's eyes. "As my friends used to say: Big spiritual power, tiny little di…"

"Arisawa-san!" Yuzu interrupted, her cheeks flushed. "Please don't insult Ishida!"

Ishida slapped her hand aside. "My endowments are more than just spiritual. I don't need to prove myself to some over-muscled, flat-chested female."

"Flat-chested?!" Tatsuki balled up her fist. Karin and Yuzu grabbed onto her arm.

"Sit down, Tatsuki-chan!" Karin cried. "The next inning's about to start."

Tatsuki sat back down. "I'm not flat-chested," she grumbled. "Besides, everyone looks flat-chested next to Orihime."

Asano flung an arm around Tatsuki's shoulders. "I would be happy to assess the fulsomeness of your bosom for you Arisawa-san." He held his free hand poised in front of her chest. "I'll just give one a good squeeze and…" His voice trailed off in a gurgle, mainly because Tatsuki had him by the throat.

"Touch my tits and you die."

Asano slowly moved his hands away. Tatsuki released him.

Karin grinned at Ishida. "I still say Ishida doesn't know how to play baseball."

"Can we all just shut up and watch the game?" Ishida growled. "I should have sat with the Hollows."


	4. Inning Four

**Inning Four**

Hanataro ran out to the plate with four balls in his hands. "Here are more balls, Kurosaki-san!"

Isshin took the balls and stuffed them into his pants pockets.

"Man, that ball boy's just as cute as can be!" Yoruichi exclaimed.

Urahara eyed her from under his hat. "Hmm… First it's redheads, and now youngsters. You have… extensive tastes, Yoruichi."

"Hey! I just said he was cute!"

"Cute enough to snack on!" a bulky Hollow agreed. "Hey, ball boy! Why don't you bring a few balls up here? Some of us Hollows want to play catch."

Hanataro's large eyes got larger. "I don't think so! You just want to eat my soul!"

"Don't be silly! We just want to lick off a little spiritual energy! You'll hardly notice! Maybe you'll enjoy it!"

Hanataro scurried back into the Shinigami dugout.

"Quit hassling our ball boy!" an eleventh squad member shouted.

"Yeah!" Another eleventh squad member jumped to his feet and shook a fist. "You Hollows are all sneaky, worthless lowlifes!"

"Well, you Shinigami are arrogant, cocky jackasses!"

"Why don't you come over here and say that to my face, donut!"

"Who you callin' donut?!"

"I'm callin' you donut, donut! You got powdered sugar in that hole of yours, pussy? I bet all your Hollow buddies think you're real sweet!" The eleventh squad howled with laughter and the insulted Hollow jumped to his feet.

"That's it! I'm ripping out your guts, Shinigami scum!"

"You can try, Hollow filth!"

A dozen eleventh squad members charged toward the Hollow section and an equal number of Hollows surged toward the Shinigami.

"Ladies and gentlemen!" Urahara blared through the loud speakers. "There will be no fighting in the stands! Please resume your seats so the game can continue." Shinigami from other squads forced the eleventh squad members to return to their seats, and the Hollows reluctantly sat down as well. But the two sides continued to throw angry glares at one another. "That's better," Urahara said as order was restored. "Up next for the Arrancar is Tousen. The blind captain seems to be having a little trouble settling into the game, but I'm sure that will change at any moment."

"He's pretty worthless if he can't drag us all down to his level," Yoruichi said pointedly.

Tousen stepped up to the plate, swinging his bat casually. Ichigo took the sign and threw in a slow breaking ball. Tousen swung and missed. The next pitch was a curve ball and Tousen hit it with a loud crack. But the ball rolled straight to Kenpachi and he picked it up without even removing his foot from the base. Tousen heaved an annoyed sigh.

"At least you made contact this time," Luppi said snidely. "You're improving."

Tousen returned to the dugout without a word.

Gin glided out of the on-deck circle with his wide smile folding his eyes nearly closed. "We're gettin' a lot of contact on ya, Ichigo," he purred. "Maybe your arm's gettin' a little tired?"

"You'll know when I'm tired!" Ichigo snapped. "And it won't be from dealing with the likes of you!"

"Now, now! Don't take it personally." Gin glided up to the plate and hunched over, his bat poised in the air above his shoulder. He let the first two pitches go by and jumped on the third one, but it rolled to Rukia at shortstop and she threw him out easily.

A collective grown rose up from the Hollows.

"It's two out and one of the Arrancar's weakest players, Wonderweiss, is at bat," Urahara announced. "It doesn't look like the Arrancar are going to add to their lead this inning."

Tousen led Wonderweiss from the dugout and positioned him at the plate. He leaned over and put his face in front of Wonderweiss'. "Scrunch down a little," he said. Wonderweiss scrunched toward the ground, his bat pointing straight up. "That's good. Stay like that." Tousen walked back to the dugout.

Ichigo scowled at Wonderweiss, whose strike zone was now the height of a jar of peanut butter. "That's ridiculous! He can't swing like that!"

"Just pitch the ball," Isshin ordered.

Grumbling to himself, Ichigo went for the fast ball.

"Ball one!"

"Dammit!"

"Ball two!"

"Goddamit!"

"Ball three!"

"Stupid fucking shit!"

Ichigo leaned in for the sign, rolling the ball over in his hand. Finally, he took a long, slow windup and smoked in his best fastball.

"Ball four!"

"No fucking way!" Ichigo threw his glove down in disgust.

"Uwah!" Wonderweiss exclaimed.

Tousen jogged out of the dugout and took his hand. "Come with me." He jogged Wonderweiss to first base. "Stay here, Wonderweiss. Wait until Szayel hits the ball."

"Uhw?"

"Just wait here." Tousen jogged back to the dugout.

Szayel swaggered up to the plate. He took a few easy swings, smirking at Ichigo. Ichigo glared back. He pitched a breaking ball and Szayel floated it into center field, just over the tip of the leaping Ikkaku's glove. He sprinted for first and then stared in dismay at the unmoving Wonderweiss. "Run, you idiot!"

Wonderweiss pointed at the ball. "Bah?"

Renji, charging in from center field, scooped up the ball and threw it to Ikkaku. Ikkaku tapped second base with an amused grin on his face and Szayel slapped his forehead.

"You were supposed to run!" he screamed at Wonderweiss.

Wonderweiss blinked at him for a second, then turned and sprinted to second base. Ikkaku touched him with the ball. Noba blinked once. "Out."

"Why the hell is he playing?!" several Hollows screamed at the Arrancar dugout. "He's brain-damaged!"

Ulquiorra blinked once at the crowd and the Hollows immediately fell into a subdued silence.

"He's scary," someone whispered.

"So, the Arrancar fail to add to their lead," Urahara announced. "Let's see if the Shinigami can take advantage of this opportunity."

"They may have to wait a few minutes," Yoruichi said. "It looks like the Arrancar left-fielder is distracted."

Still at second base, Wonderweiss crouched down to stare at a butterfly that had chosen that moment to land on Noba's head. "Ooo!" Wonderweiss poked a finger at the butterfly and it fluttered away. "Ah!" Wonderweiss followed it, unfortunately wandering away from his position in left field. With a sigh, Halibel caught his hand and led him back to the Arrancar dugout.

Tousen handed him his glove and pointed at left field. "Go to your position."

Wonderweiss grinned at his glove, shoved it on his hand, and scampered out into left field, where he promptly plopped down with his legs splayed out so he could stare at a dandelion.

There was a universal slapping of foreheads among the Hollow spectators.

As the rest of the Arrancar team jogged onto the field, Szayel sneered at Grimmjow. "That worthless human pitching for the Shinigami is showing you up. He has more strikeouts than you do. I could do much better."

"Hah!" Nnoitra snorted. "You're too weak! We need someone strong like me pitching! I am the strongest of the Arrancar, after all." He puffed out his chest.

"Pitching is a precision skill," Grimmjow retorted hotly. "Neither one of you is good enough. I'll show you!" He settled into his stance as the Shinigami batter stepped up to the plate.

"First up is Abarai Renji," Urahara announced. "He popped up in his last at bat."

Grimmjow threw a fastball, and Renji swung and missed. In the coaching box, Byakuya's lips thinned slightly. Renji scowled. The next pitch was a breaking ball and Renji missed again. Byakuya blinked once. Renji swore under his breath. Grimmjow pitched a knuckleball and Renji tipped it. The ball smacked into the backstop with a resounding clang. Byakuya folded his arms. "Gah!" Renji cried, and he smacked his bat on the ground.

"Byakuya's giving him a real tongue-lashing out there," Ganju remarked.

"He sure is," Matsumoto agreed, leaning on the dugout rail and allowing a generous portion of bosom to spill into view. "But Byakuya has high expectations of him."

Grimmjow wound up and pitched a slider. Renji missed it high, swinging so hard that he almost lost his balance. "Shit!" He jammed his bat into the ground to keep from falling.

"Uh oh," Matsumoto said. "He'll have to make that one up to his captain."

"What? Like spend a few hours as a footstool while Byakuya reads reports?" Ganju chuckled.

"If he's lucky."

"I wouldn't let him off so easy," Hitsugaya put in. "With a bankai like his he should at least be able to hit the stupid ball."

Renji stamped into the dugout, his face scarlet.

"Don't worry about it," Ichigo said. "I'm sure he'll give you your balls back if you get a hit next time."

Renji threw himself down on the bench. "Does he publicly admonish anyone else like that? No! It's just me! I'm the only one he needs to humiliate that way!"

"The first Shinigami batter strikes out," Urahara announced, "bringing Chad to the plate. Chad got a single last time. The human players are really holding their own against the immortals, wouldn't you say, Yoruichi?"

"Absolutely, Urahara!" Yoruichi agreed enthusiastically. "These humans are showing that they are just as big and as powerful as any Shinigami or Arrancar. And Chad here is the strong, silent type, too. Just what you need when you're looking for a lot of performance and not a lot of talk."

Chad trotted silently out of the on-deck circle and faced Grimmjow with his bat at the ready. Grimmjow scowled back and shook off the first two signs. Then he wound up and pitched a high fastball. Chad swung and just managed to tip the ball. It popped over Gin and Isshin's heads and rolled to the backstop. Hanataro dashed out to get it.

"Strike one!"

Chad blinked once at his bat and settled in for the next pitch. Grimmjow pitched another fastball, this one low and outside. Chad swung again, making no contact at all.

"Strike two!"

"Come on, Chad!" Ichigo shouted from the dugout. "What are you playing at? This pussy is no pitcher! Get a hit!"

Grimmjow smirked. He faced Gin to get the sign and then nodded confidently. He wound up and delivered.

"Unh!" Chad grunted as he swung, but it was too soon. The breaking ball dropped in just after his bat went through the strike zone.

"Strike three!" Isshin cried. "You're out!"

Chad gripped the barrel of his bat as he walked back to the dugout.

"It's ok, Chad!" Tatsuki shouted from the stands. "You're still batting .500, which is better than most of those scummy Arrancar!"

"Who are you calling scummy, puny human?!" a big Hollow cried out. "Our Arrancar are worth a dozen of your wretched Shinigami, and you humans don't count at all!"

"If we don't count," Tatsuki said with a superior grin on her face, "how come you Hollows are always trying to eat our souls? That makes us way better than you!"

"Hah!" the Hollow shouted back. "You're just cattle, nothing more!"

"Well, moo!" Tatsuki laughed.

"Yeah!" Karin jumped to her feet. "You're envious of us! You want to be human, so that totally makes us better!"

"That's not true!"

"You got human-envy!"

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Shut up!"

"Make me!"

The Hollow charged out of his seat, bounding over the heads of neighboring Hollows.

"Gimme that soccer ball, Yuzu," Karin said calmly.

"Why does she have a soccer ball?" Ishida muttered.

Karin bounced the soccer ball on her hand as the Hollow bounded toward her, and then she leaped up and kicked the ball squarely into the Hollow's bony face. The creature slammed over backward, crashing into other Hollows.

"Get off, stupid! We're trying to watch the game!"

"She insulted me!"

"Well, that wouldn't be hard!" a slender, nearly human looking Hollow snapped. "You're stupid even for a Hollow."

"What?!" The angry Hollow plunged at his erstwhile comrade, his clawed hands reaching for the slender Hollow's throat. The slender Hollow calmly grabbed one of those outstretched hands and flipped the Hollow into another row.

"Dammit!" several Hollows shouted. They picked up the hapless Hollow and flung him back toward his seat. "Sit down and shut up, fool! You're making us look bad."

"Opening your mouths makes you fools look bad!" An eleventh squad member howled. "That dinky little human showed you up proper!"

"Ladies and gentlemen," Urahara announced, "we cannot resume the game until order is restored in the stands. Jinta! Ururu! More refreshments."

Slowly, the crowd settled down and Ikkaku strolled toward the plate, swinging his bat above his head and back over his shoulders. All but the last button of his uniform had come undone, revealing the hard planes of his chest and abs.

Ayasegawa squealed, clasping his hands together reverently. "Oh my! Do you see that? Such definition! Such firmness! I wish I could run my hands over him!"

The Shinigami in the next seat blinked at him. "Um, you might not want to say stuff like that out loud."

"But he's so beautiful!"

"Ok, you definitely don't want to say stuff like that out loud. People are gonna wonder about you."

"But how can you not appreciate such perfect masculine beauty? You know I have a deep appreciation for all things beautiful." Ayasegawa sighed wistfully. "His skin looks damp. Isn't that an arousing sight?"

The other Shinigami shifted over slightly and waved a hand at Ururu. "Beer! I need a beer over here!"

Ikkaku took his position at the plate with a gleam in his eye. Grimmjow grinned back maniacally. Then he blew Ikkaku down with three straight fastballs. Ikkaku swore furiously as he stamped back to the dugout.

"He's beautiful even when he's striking out," Ayasegawa purred happily. "I could just stare at him all day."

The Shinigami beside him chugged half his beer. "Yeah, but now the side's out. He should have gotten a hit."

"Well," Ayasegawa shrugged. "Beauty isn't always perfect."

"You're nuts."

Grimmjow swaggered back to the dugout. "I doubt either of you could have done as good a job," he gloated to Szayel and Nnoitra. "My skills are more than a match for these weak Shinigami. You wretches would have allowed them to get hits."

"Don't become overconfident," Ulquiorra said, his eyes fixed on Grimmjow. "The Shinigami can hurt you if you let your guard down."

"Of course," Grimmjow said quickly. "I know that."

Ulquiorra tipped his head slightly to the side. "Good. Because if that happened, then I would have to hurt you, too."

Grimmjow flinched. "I've got it all under control," he said loudly. "You have nothing to worry about."

"I'm so glad to hear that."

"That's the end of the fourth inning and the score remains 3-2 in favor of the Arrancar," Urahara announced. "Both teams seem to have settled in now, wouldn't you say, Yoruichi?"

"That's right, Urahara. This game is definitely becoming more interesting." She laughed. "And the fans are pretty entertaining, too. Although the Hollows don't seem to have much aptitude for soccer."

"Boo! The color announcer is showing her bias again!"

"I'll show you my bias!" Yoruichi shouted. She jumped up and started to yank down the back of her pants.

Urahara grabbed her and pulled her back down into her seat. "That will be quite enough of that, Yoruichi!" he said firmly. "There are families in the audience."

"I'm sick of their whining."

"Just behave yourself."

In the Shinigami dugout, Yachiru climbed up onto Ichigo's shoulder. "They're still in the lead, carrot-top," she said with a pout. "You need to get them all out again."

"Hey, I'm doing my best!"

"So keep it up!" Yachiru smacked him on the head and did a back flip off his shoulder onto the ground. "Everybody work hard! We can beat these Arrancar just like we always do. Go get 'em!" She thrust her little fist into the air and grinned hugely.

"Right!" The Shinigami players charged out of the dugout for the top of the fifth inning.

"The two coaches have completely different styles for motivating their teams," Urahara said. "It will be interesting to see which method produces the better results."

"Hmm," Yoruichi said. "Ultra-cuteness or stomach-clenching fear? It's a tough call."


	5. Inning Five

**Inning Five**

"Leading off the top of the fifth is Nnoitra," Urahara announced. "He's had one hit in two at-bats."

The tall Arrancar swaggered to the base. "I'm prepared for you this time, human," he said with a superior smirk. "Give me your best shot." He scrunched over, his bat held high over his shoulder.

Ichigo scowled. He pitched an outside breaking ball, but Nnoitra didn't go for it. The next pitch was a fastball, and Nnoitra pounced on it with a sharp swing. With a loud crack, the ball shot into right field. Hitsugaya turned and sprinted for the fence, but the ball flew over his head. He played it off the wall, but Nnoitra was already rounding second.

Luppi threw up his hands. "Hold up!" he shouted. Nnoitra looked like he planned to round third for home and Luppi waved his arms. "I said stop, you idiot!" he shouted.

The insult worked. Nnoitra slid into third feet first with an infuriated look on his face. "Why did you tell me to stop?!" he shouted angrily. "I could have made it home!"

"Oh, really?" Luppi pointed at Matsumoto, who was now holding the ball. Nnoitra's mouth fell open. "That right fielder can throw. He almost got you out." Luppi smirked lopsidedly. "Always listen to the base coach."

Nnoitra turned to stare at Hitsugaya, who was rubbing his shoulder.

"He's real accurate, too," Luppi added snidely.

"Shut up!" Nnoitra growled.

Zommari strode silently up to the plate, as usual.

Byakuya, leaning on the dugout fence, cleared his throat. "Should I mention that this batter has made solid contact at both at-bats?"

Ichigo glowered at him. "I'm aware of that!"

"And the batter after that is their strongest hitter."

"And your point is?"

"Perhaps you might want to consider pitching a few strikeouts."

Ichigo muttered something under his breath that sounded both unflattering and physiologically impossible. He took the sign from Ganju and pitched a hard slider. Zommari swung and missed. Ichigo went for the breaking ball and Zommari made contact, but not solidly. The ball rolled back to Ichigo on the mound. He held Nnoitra on third with a look and then threw Zommari out at first.

Byakuya lifted an eyebrow. "Not quite a strikeout, but effective in holding the runner."

"Wow!" Yoruichi exclaimed. "That almost sounded like a compliment. Someone better check that man for a fever!"

"There was a suspiciously praise-like quality to that statement," Urahara agreed. "Perhaps the sun is getting to him."

In center field, Renji snorted angrily. "For that meager performance, he gets a _compliment_?! That's just not right!"

Byakuya sniffed. "I will certainly be glad to mention it when my second-in-command manages to do something that doesn't completely shame the sixth."

"Augh!" Renji screamed.

"Maybe it would be better if he went back to the silent admonishment," Hitsugaya suggested from left field.

"I don't need any advice from you, half-pint!"

"Excuse me?!"

"You heard me, shorty!"

Hitsugaya started for center field. "I think you might want to rephrase that, 0 for 2!"

"Oh, yeah?!" Renji started for right field.

"EXCUSE ME!" Ichigo screamed. "Do the outfielders mind if I pitch to the batter now?!"

The two Shinigami pulled up and stared sheepishly toward the infield. But they continued to throw angry glares over their shoulders at each other as they returned to their positions.

"Thank you!" Ichigo faced Yammi. "Sorry for the delay. I'll get on with your strikeout, now."

"What?!" Yammi snorted. "I don't think so, puny!" He took a few slow swings as he settled into his stance. "Just blow one in here. I'll give your outfielders something to do besides whine at each other."

"Hah!" Ichigo did a full wind-up, but instead of a fastball, he floated in a high breaking ball. Yammi got under it and popped it up high into right field. "Shit!"

Nnoitra tagged up at third and leaned toward home eagerly. As the ball plopped into Hitsugaya's glove, he took off running. Hitsugaya's throw came in only seconds late as Nnoitra slid head first into home. But that didn't stop Ganju from clouting Nnoitra on the side of the head with a hard tag.

"Safe!" Isshin declared loudly.

"Is that all you have to say?!" Nnoitra demanded. "He hit me with the ball!"

Isshin blinked. "The tag was late. You slid head first. These things happen."

"He did it on purpose!"

Ganju blinked innocently. "I was aiming for his arm?"

"See?" Isshin said. "An unfortunate accident. The run still counts."

"Humph!" Nnoitra stamped back to the dugout.

Luppi glared at him as he went by. "You don't even have a bruise! I have a huge lump from you throwing your bat at me! Serves you right!"

"Oh, shut up!"

Yammi jogged back into the dugout. "You can all thank me for bringing the run home," he said generously.

Ulquiorra blinked at him. "There would be two runs if you'd hit a home run instead of a pop fly."

"But…"

"Perhaps next time you'll live up to my expectations."

Yammi slumped down on the bench with a big pout on his face.

"He reminds me a little bit of Byakuya," Yoruichi remarked with a shiver.

"I have to agree there are similarities in their personalities," Urahara acknowledged. "Although I think Byakuya is less likely to gut his players for failing to perform."

"That's just because he's not the team manager."

"Good point. Next up is Stark. He hit a home run in his last at-bat."

Stark slouched up to the plate with his bat slung over one shoulder. "Man, I'm tired! Do I really need to do this again?"

Ichigo snickered. "You could just stand there and let me strike you out."

"Really? You'd do that for me? You're a pretty decent fellow."

"Right." Ichigo wound up and pitched a fastball. It blazed past Stark's unmoving form. "Come on, you could at least pretend," Ichigo said. "Your manager might get annoyed with you otherwise."

"You raise a good point," Stark said. He glanced quickly at Ulquiorra and hunched over into a batting stance. "This will make it look better."

Ichigo flamed in another fastball and Stark made an ineffectual swing at it.

"Strike two!"

"How about one more just like that?" Ichigo suggested.

"That works for me."

Ichigo blew in a fastball that smoked into Ganju's glove before Stark even started his swing. He let the momentum of his swing carry him around and propel him into a stumbling walk back to the dugout.

"Strike three! Side's out!"

Ganju handed the ball to Isshin and the Shinigami jogged off the field.

"What was that?" Ulquiorra asked pointedly as Stark entered the dugout.

"A strikeout," Stark said with a yawn. He sank down on the bench and pulled his cap down over his eyes. "I'll just catch a quick nap before we start the next inning."

"Idiot!" Grimmjow kicked his feet. "Have you forgotten that we have to take the field while the Shinigami are batting?"

Stark groaned. "That's really inconvenient. Don't they have designated fielders in this game?"

"Get off your ass and get out there!" Grimmjow screamed.

Stark sat up to find Ulquiorra regarding him with a completely flat expression. He swallowed. "Right! Of course! Right field! That's me!" He scurried out of the dugout and galloped into right field.

"Old lazybones can move when he wants to," Yoruichi observed.

"Ganju is leading off the fifth for the Shinigami," Urahara announced. "He ran out a long single in his first at-bat. He's not a Shinigami, but he's quick and strong."

"He's going to need to come out strong to make up a two-run deficit," Yoruichi said.

Grimmjow smirked at Ganju. "I won't underestimate you this time. I've got some pitches you can't hit."

Ganju grinned. "I like the sound of that! Let's go!"

Grimmjow started out with a knuckleball and it dropped in for a strike.

"Nice one!" Ganju exclaimed. "What else you got?"

"Try this." Grimmjow wound up slowly and then exploded into the pitch. The fastball blurred toward home plate, but Ganju cracked it over Grimmjow's head and into center field. Yammi ran in for the ball and Ganju pulled up as he rounded first.

"I liked that pitch," Ganju said with a grin.

Grimmjow snatched the ball out of the air as Yammi threw it in, but managed to hold his tongue.

Matsumoto bounced up to the plate, her majestic and nearly independent bosom drawing nearly every eye in the stadium.

"That's ridiculous!" Grimmjow exclaimed. "How do you expect to even swing the bat with your tits hanging out like that?"

Matsumoto batted her eyes at him. "I can swing a sword just fine. How different is a bat? Anyway, you want to throw me one of those nice fastballs?"

Grimmjow growled and waited for the sign from Gin. He started with a curveball that dipped into her strike zone at the last moment.

"Strike one!"

"Oh dear!" Matsumoto heaved a big sigh, treating everyone to an even better view of her magnificent endowment. "That was tricky." She leaned toward the mound and Grimmjow paled. "Are you sure you don't want to throw me a fastball?"

"Urg…" Grimmjow choked. He stared down at the ball in his hand.

Gin chuckled. "Now ya shouldn't be distracting our pitcher like that, missy."

"Oh, come on!" Matsumoto laughed. "From everything I've heard he wouldn't know what to do with these anyway!"

"What?!" Grimmjow's head snapped up. "Goddammit! I am a normal man!" He whirled into his pitch and blazed in a smoking fastball.

Matsumoto swung hard, but missed. "Drat!" Another button on her uniform popped free and her jugs spilled into plain view.

"Cover up the kids' eyes, folks!" Yoruichi laughed, "or they'll get an education on female anatomy."

"A hefty education," Urahara agreed, also laughing.

"Matsumoto!" Hitsugaya shouted. "You're embarrassing me! Cover yourself up!"

"I told you to strap 'em down, Rangiku-san," Rukia said, trying hard not to laugh. "It's easier to run if they're not bouncing all over the place."

"But then I can't breathe," Matsumoto pouted. She shoved her tits back in and fastened a few of her uniform buttons.

Isshin cleared his throat. "Um, excuse me, but you struck out. You're out."

Matsumoto wrinkled her nose. "Oh, fine." She jogged back to the dugout.

Ichigo trotted out to the plate. "Hey, Grimmjow, I think you're getting too cocky. It's time I took you down a peg."

"You're nothing but talk!"

"It wasn't talk that made contact with your pitches the last two times," Ichigo smirked. He swung his bat a few times. "Shall we make a bet on whether I get a hit this time? If I get on base, you have to admit you like it up the a…"

"Ichigo!" Isshin barked. "It is illegal for players to bet on the performance of their own team."

Grimmjow flushed bright red.

"Whatever. Let's go."

"Ya sure tease that boy a lot," Gin remarked as he made signs below his glove. "Maybe ya'll are interested?"

"In that?" Ichigo snorted. "If I swung that way, I'd still want a real man."

"You scrawny, red-headed jackass!" Grimmjow screamed. "I am a real man!" He threw a fastball, but the delivery was a little high. Ichigo leaped on it and the ball blazed into right field, just clearing the leaping Tousen's glove. Ganju pounded into the turn at second and sprinted hard for third. Ichigo put his head down and charged for first, beating the throw from Stark by several paces. Ganju made it into third standing up. Grimmjow threw his glove on the ground.

Gin trotted out to the mound. "Ya let him get to ya."

"He keeps harping on my manhood!" Grimmjow complained.

Gin patted his shoulder. "I know ya got it where it counts, dear boy. Now quit lettin' him rattle ya." He picked up Grimmjow's glove. "Now stay focused. Ya only got one out and a runner at third."

"Yeah, yeah!" Grimmjow muttered. He took his glove and jammed it back on his hand.

Hitsugaya marched up to the plate swinging his bat. He took his stance and made a few easy swings while Grimmjow waited for the sign he wanted. Then Grimmjow took a deep breath, paused for a moment to settle himself, and then flowed into the pitch. Hitsugaya's bat snapped around in a blur and cracked a fly ball down the left field line.

A cry of anguish ripped from the throat of every Hollow in the stands. "NOOOOO!"

Wonderweiss was sitting spread-eagled in the grass, leaning on his elbows and staring intently at something between his knees.

"Wonderweiss!" Yammi screamed. "Get off your ass and catch the ball!"

Wonderweiss looked up and pointed at the grass. "Ah!" Very carefully, he pinched something between his fingers and held it up. It was a green and black striped caterpillar.

Yammi slapped his forehead and charged for left field, but it was too late. The ball bounced just inside the left field line and rolled all the way to the fence. Ganju scored easily before Yammi was even close to the ball. Ichigo scored, earning a high-five from Ganju, as Yammi picked up the ball and threw it in. Hitsugaya ran flat out and Shunsui spun his arm, sending Hitsugaya around third toward home. Szayel let Yammi's throw go over his head and Gin played it on the bounce, but the ball was too high to make the tag. He swept his glove down to catch the sliding Hitsugaya, but the Shinigami's foot had already hooked the plate.

"He's safe!" Isshin shouted, flinging his arms out sharply.

"Yeah!" The Shinigami crowd surged to their feet, cheering wildly.

"Way to leg it out, Toushirou!" Karin shouted.

Hitsugaya, in the midst of getting high-fives from his teammates, glared at the stands. "Don't call me Toushirou!"

"Amazing!" Urahara exclaimed. "I think Hitsugaya-taicho might have gotten a triple on that hit even if the left-fielder hadn't been distracted by a bug."

"Caterpillars are fascinating," Yoruichi said gravely, but she was grinning broadly.

"And as so often happens in this game, a single play completely turns things around," Urahara continued. "Hitsugaya-taicho's homer puts the Shinigami on top by a score of five to four, and there's still only one out."

"If the Arrancar aren't careful, the Shinigami just might break this thing open," Yoruichi added.

"Up next is Kuchiki Rukia. She has the only other home run for the Shinigami."

Rukia came to the plate wearing her usual serious expression. She let the first pitch go by.

"Ball one!"

She started to swing on the second pitch and pulled up.

"Ball two!"

She cracked the third pitch straight at the shortstop and Nnoitra threw her out easily. She looped around the coach's box and headed back toward the dugout with a disappointed frown on her face.

"They can't all be home runs," Ichigo said.

"I don't see why not," Rukia grumbled. "Next time."

In the on-deck circle, Kenpachi laughed aloud. "That's a good attitude! That's what I need. If two tiny people like Rukia-san and Hitsugaya-san can hit home runs, I certainly should be able to."

"Who are you calling tiny, spike-head?" Hitsugaya shouted.

Ken lumbered up to the plate and pointed his bat at Grimmjow. "You won't defeat me this time! I'm going to hit one out!"

Grimmjow scowled. "Enough of this shit!" he snarled. He bent over to read the sign and then straightened up for his wind-up. He pitched a knuckleball. Kenpachi swung and missed. Grimmjow grinned. He pitched another knuckleball, but this time Kenpachi tipped it.

Kenpachi stepped out of the batter's box and glared at his bat. "This thing is too small! How am I supposed to hit anything with such a miniscule little twig?"

"What are you talking about?" Ichigo exclaimed. "You fight with an itty bitty little _zanpakuto_! How can this be any different?"

Kenpachi's eyebrows shot up. "Hey! That's right!" He gripped the handle of the bat firmly and stepped back into the batter's box. "I can do this!" He grinned maniacally at Grimmjow.

Grimmjow grinned back and threw a curveball way outside.

"Ungh!" Kenpachi swung hard and completely missed it. "What?!"

"Strike three!" Isshin hooked his thumb over his shoulder. "That's the inning."

"But… but…" Kenpachi stared at his bat unbelievingly. Then his shoulders slumped and he stumped droopily back toward the dugout. He was met halfway by Yachiru, who climbed up the front of his uniform and sat on his shoulder.

"What are you doing, Keni? I'm totally embarrassed." She smacked his forehead with her open palm. "Baseball is a precision sport. You're not hacking up Hollows. You'll never hit anything all tensed up like this. So relax!"

"How am I supposed to relax if I can't fight anyone?"

Yachiru leaned over and whispered in his ear. "You know, it's perfectly legal to hit someone with the ball if you knock it into them with the bat. That's kind of like a long range attack, right?"

Kenpachi's eyes began to gleam.

"Think of it as a baseball _bankai_."

"Oh dear," Matsumoto said. "She probably shouldn't have told him that."

"Why not?" Ichigo shrugged. "It could be amusing if he brains a few Arrancar before the game is over."

In the Arrancar dugout, Ulquiorra regarded Grimmjow expressionlessly. "This inning did not go as I'd hoped."

"Well, that makes two of us!" Grimmjow snapped. He flung himself down on the bench. "And anyway, it wouldn't have been as bad if you had someone decent playing left field!"

"So don't let them hit any more into left field."

"What?!"

"In fact, perhaps you should stop letting them get any hits at all."

Grimmjow goggled. "Just how familiar are you with this game?"

"I have completely memorized the rules, physics and strategy of baseball."

"When? Yesterday?"

"Actually, it was three days ago."

"WHAT?!"

"There isn't much to it."

Grimmjow put his hand over his face. "And you dare to question my pitching?"

"Just try to be more precise. It can't be that hard."

Grimmjow's mouth worked silently and he retreated to the far end of the dugout.

"And that's the end of the fifth," Urahara announced. "The Shinigami will be taking a 5-4 lead into the top of the sixth. I think we're going to see some hard hitting from here on out."


	6. Inning Six

**Inning Six**

"I'm really excited about this inning, Urahara," Yoruichi said brightly. "Both teams showed a lot of energy in the fifth. If that carries over, we should see a lot more scoring this inning."

"I agree, Yoruichi! I think we're going to see a lot of action." Urahara consulted his notes. "Leading off for the Arrancar is Grimmjow. Grimmjow's hit a double and a pop fly so far."

Grimmjow marched up to the plate swinging his bat in wide arcs. He grinned fiercely at Ichigo. "I'm letting my bat do the talking from now on," he growled. He leaned over and positioned the bat high over his right shoulder.

Ichigo just smirked. "Whatever." He threw a breaking ball and Grimmjow swung and missed. "Seems like you're bat's blowin' the same smoke you were," he sneered.

Grimmjow sneered back and crouched down a little. Ichigo threw a curveball and Grimmjow missed again. He stepped back for a minute and drew a deep breath, tapping the bat on his shoulder. Then he leaned back over the plate and stared hard at Ichigo. Ichigo wound up slowly and then blazed in a fastball. Grimmjow's bat snapped around and he hit the ball high toward right-center field with a sharp crack.

Renji backed up several steps and then stopped. Hitsugaya never moved. They both watched the ball fly over the fence and then turned to regard Ichigo wordlessly.

Byakuya blinked once. "Excuse me, Kurosaki, but what was that?"

"It was a fucking home run, asshole!"

The Hollow fans were on their feet, cheering wildly. "Yay, Grimmjow! Great hit!"

Grimmjow jogged around the bases with a big smile, waving to the crowd appreciatively. He sashayed into the dugout and went right up to Ulquiorra. "Now tell me that wasn't great!"

Ulquiorra tipped his head slightly to one side. "It was certainly better than I expected."

"What?!" Grimmjow's face turned red. "What do you mean 'better than expected'? I'm the best hitter on this team! I hit a home run! What more do you want?!"

"Well," Ulquiorra touched his chin. "You could have done that with someone on base. That would have been really helpful."

"I was the first one at-bat!" Grimmjow screamed. "How am I supposed to hit a home run with runners on base if I'm the first one up?!"

"I admit that poses a problem."

"AUGGHHH!!!" Grimmjow stamped to the far end of the dugout and punched a hole in the wall.

"The Arrancar manager is tough to please," Yoruichi remarked. "But I guess you have to set high standards if you want the most out of your team."

"That's right," Urahara agreed. "Up next is Tousen, who has yet to get on base."

Tousen settled in at the plate with an open stance, his upper body turned partially toward Ichigo.

"That's kind of an unconventional stance," Ganju remarked.

"But I think it will be more effective for me," Tousen replied gravely. He waited unmoving for the first pitch. It was a curveball inside, but Tousen dipped his shoulders and caught it close to the handle of the bat. The ball bounced slowly down the third base line. Matsumoto dashed in for it and fielded it bare-handed, but her throw was off-balance and arrived behind the streaking Tousen.

"He's safe!" Lirin declared loudly, her little wings spread wide.

"Dammit!" Matsumoto exclaimed.

Ken tossed the ball back to Ichigo.

"Are you getting tired, Ichi-chan?" Yachiru called.

"No, I am not getting tired!" Ichigo snapped. "I'll get the rest of them." He scowled angrily toward the plate as Gin strolled up to it, his usual happy smile a little wider than usual.

"Ya'll are given up the hits," Gin drawled. "Maybe ya'll've got another one for me?"

"Oh, shut up!" Ichigo growled. He took the sign and paused for a moment before flowing into his pitch. The breaking ball dropped just as Gin brought his bat around for another bunt and the ball took a huge bounce. "I got it!" Ichigo shouted. He dashed forward and caught the ball as it came down. He looked at second, but Tousen was already dropping into a slide, having taken off from first before Gin even contacted the ball. So Ichigo threw the ball to Kenpachi, who was waiting expectantly at first.

"Gin advances the runner," Urahara announced, "giving us one out with a runner at second. The Arrancar have another scoring opportunity brewing. Let's see how the Shinigami answer it."

"They may not need to," Yoruichi chuckled. "Wonderweiss is up next."

With Tousen on base, everyone else just stared with dismay at the little blond Arrancar, who was sitting in the on-deck circle playing in the dirt. There was no bat in sight.

Grimmjow smacked his forehead, snagged a bat and stamped out of the dugout. "Wonderweiss, you idiot, take the bat and hit the ball!"

Wonderweiss took the bat by the barrel and stared at it. "Bat?"

Grimmjow groaned. "Yes, it's a bat! You hit the ball with it. Go hit the ball with the bat!"

Wonderweiss blinked at him, wide-eyed. "Ball?"

Grimmjow scrubbed a hand over his face. "Yes!" He pointed at Ichigo. "Hit the ball that the orange-head over there throws at you with the bat!" He tugged the bat out of Wonderweiss' hands and held it out handle first. "Hold this end." When Wonderweiss took it, he tapped the barrel. "Hit it with this end." He pulled Wonderweiss to his feet and shoved him toward the plate. "You gotta stand by the plate to hit the ball."

"Uwah!" Wonderweiss exclaimed. He trotted over to the plate and stood next to it, letting the bat rest on his right shoulder.

Ichigo lifted one eyebrow. Wonderweiss stared at him intently. Ichigo pitched a fastball and Wonderweiss hit it! The ball screamed between second and a diving Rukia, bouncing into left-center field. Tousen took off for third, leaping over the prone Rukia.

Wonderweiss, however, stood unmoving at home plate, watching the ball roll. "Ball!" He pointed at the ball.

"Run, you idiot!" Grimmjow screamed.

"Wonderweiss!" Tousen shouted as he neared third, "there's a butterfly on first base! Over there!" He pointed at Kenpachi.

"B'r'fly?" Wonderweiss said and he ambled off toward first.

Renji fielded the ball quickly and Luppi held Tousen up at third, so Renji threw the ball to Kenpachi. Wonderweiss wandered behind the coach's box and Halibel groaned.

Kenpachi looked at Lirin. "Uh, do I have to tag him?"

"Oh, he's out," Lirin said with a dismissive wave of her wing.

"Wonderweiss!" Tousen called. "Go back to the dugout!"

Wonderweiss looked up and stared at him blankly.

Hanataro jogged out of the Shinigami dugout and took Wonderweiss' hand. "Come on, you need to go this way." He led Wonderweiss back to his dugout. "There's a good fellow." He patted Wonderweiss on the shoulder and dug into his pocket with his other hand. "Here, have a sucker." He handed the sweet to Wonderweiss.

"Eee!" Wonderweiss squealed. He showed the sucker to Ulquiorra.

"That's nice," Ulquiorra said. He took the wrapper off the sucker. "Go sit down."

"Well, I have to say I'm a little surprised, Yoruichi," Urahara said. "That was a solid hit. I guess we need to stop second-guessing the Arrancar manager for choosing that particular player."

"It was just luck," Yoruichi grumbled. "Ururu! I could use a beer!"

"The Arrancar now have two outs with a runner at third," Urahara continued. "Let's see if Szayel can get the runner home."

Szayel swaggered up to the plate and sneered at Ichigo. "Looks like everybody's getting hits off you now, human. You sure didn't hold up long."

"You wanna see how long I can hold up, just bend over!" Ichigo snapped. He leaned in for the sign with a glare on his face. Szayel smirked as he settled into a tight stance that hugged the plate. Ichigo shook off the first two signs. Then he nodded and grinned. The pitch was a curveball outside and Szayel let it go by. The next pitch was high and inside and Szayel had to lean back sharply to avoid being hit.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Szayel yelled. "Watch it!"

"What?" Ichigo laughed. "You can't take a little brush-back? Pussy!"

"Ichigo…" Isshin warned.

"Yeah, yeah." Ichigo looked in for a new sign. The next pitch was a fastball and just inside. Szayel swung, but did not make solid contact. The ball floated into shallow right field and Hitsugaya caught it easily. Ichigo grinned at Szayel. "There, I let you hit it."

Szayel glowered back and stomped back to the dugout.

"How could you not score the run?!" Grimmjow exclaimed. "All you had to do was get any kind of decent hit!"

Szayel just glared at him without responding.

"Nevertheless," Tousen said as he came in to get his glove, "I would call it a successful inning. Wonderweiss got a hit."

"What about my home run?!"

"Oh, that was good, too."

"Sheesh!" Grimmjow stormed out to the mound. "And who was it got the little twerp to hit the ball in the first place? Me! All your coddling got us nowhere! If it wasn't for me carrying this team, we'd be losing by a huge margin!" Grimmjow continued to grumble as he took a few practice pitches.

"We have a tie game for the start of the Shinigami at-bat," Urahara announced. "First up is Abarai Renji."

Renji stopped by the plate to watch the last of Grimmjow's practice pitches thump into Gin's glove. "That's a pretty soft pitch," he remarked. "I could ride that right out of the park."

Gin tossed the ball back. "I'll have him throw ya something nice and hard, how's that?" He gave Grimmjow the sign under the shield of his glove.

"Perfect!" Renji grinned fiercely. "I like it hard." He moved next to the plate.

"So Kuchiki-taicho told me."

"What?!"

Grimmjow pitched a speeding fastball and caught Renji completely by surprise.

"Strike one!"

"Wait a minute!" Renji exclaimed. "I wasn't set!" He scowled at Gin and settled into his stance. Then he shifted his glare to Grimmjow. "Try that again, bone-face!"

Grimmjow smirked and wound up for another pitch. He threw another fastball but Renji was ready. He smacked the ball between first and second, and it bounced into right field. Renji tore down the line and rounded first as Stark fielded the ball.

"Don't get out," Byakuya said flatly.

Renji jerked to a halt and dove back to first as the ball came in.

"The Shinigami are off to a good start!" Yoruichi said.

"Yes, they are," Urahara agreed. "With a lead-off single, it looks like the Shinigami mean business. Next up is Chad. He scored after getting on with a single and has struck out."

Chad approached the plate expressionlessly. He let the first pitch, a knuckleball, go by.

"Ball one!"

Grimmjow frowned. The next pitch was also a knuckleball, but this time Chad swung and fouled it off. The ball floated into the stands down the first base line and several fans leaped up to catch it. One Hollow shot out an extra long tongue to slobber the ball out of the air before anyone else could reach it.

"No fair!" a dinky little Hollow who was actually wearing a glove cried. "You're supposed to use a glove!" He waved his glove-encased appendage in the air.

The victorious Hollow spat the ball into his hand. "Only pussies wear gloves!" he sneered. "But you can have it if you really want it." He held out the ball, which trailed, long slimy ropes of mucous.

The dinky Hollow turned green. "No thanks! I'll catch the next one."

Renji took a big lead off first. Grimmjow looked over his shoulder at him, but didn't try to chase him back. Instead, after two knuckleballs, he tried to slip a fastball past Chad, but Chad got a piece of it. Renji took off for second as the ball bounced inside first. Tousen had to field it, but it was too late to try a throw for second. Grimmjow was already racing for first, so Tousen tossed him the ball and he squeaked in a step ahead of Chad.

"He's out!" Lirin shouted.

"The runner moves over on a close play at first," Urahara said. "With only one out, the Shinigami are looking threatening."

Ikkaku stepped out of the on-deck circle and Yachiru bounded out to him. "Get a good hit, Baldy, so Renji can score."

Ikkaku winced and ran a hand over his smooth scalp. "That was my plan."

"Good boy!" Yachiru thumped him soundly on the arm and skipped back to the dugout.

"What am I, a dog?" Ikkaku grumbled. He rolled up his sleeves to expose his upper arms. "There, that's better. Now I can get some decent power."

In the stands, Ayasegawa sighed wistfully.

The Shinigami next to him eyed him warily. "Don't start moaning about his good looks again!" he insisted. "I really don't think I can take anymore of your hero-worship."

"I wasn't going to say anything," Ayasegawa said. "I'll just look and silently appreciate the perfect construction of his magnificently firm and deliciously smooth body." He leaned forward with his elbows on his knees and his chin in his hands. He sighed dreamily. "Yes, I'll just sit here quietly and let my eyes caress that faultless musculature, those clean, pure lines, those smoothly flowing sinews, the tight, firm buttocks…"

"That's it! I'm sitting with the Hollows!" The Shinigami jumped to his feet.

His companions pulled him back down. "Just have another beer."

"Can I dump it on his head?"

"It's a waste of good beer."

"This beer isn't that good."

"Just watch the game."

Ikkaku faced Grimmjow with a half-smile curving the side of his mouth. Renji sidled off second, taking a big lead toward third. Annoyed, Grimmjow whirled around and threw the ball to Zommari, who tried to sneak in behind Renji. Renji dove back into second easily. Zommari threw the ball back and, with a big grin, Renji sidled off second again. Grimmjow scowled and faced the batter. He threw a curveball inside and Ikkaku tried to pull it to left toward Wonderweiss. He got the direction, but not with enough power. The ball bounced straight to Nnoitra.

Renji took off anyway as soon as the ball was hit, ignoring Shunsui, who tried to wave him back to second. He pounded hard toward third and dove in head first, but Nnoitra threw him out easily.

"Out!" Kurodo declared firmly.

"Goddamit!" Renji exclaimed as he popped to his feet.

"I told you not to run," Shunsui said apologetically.

Meanwhile, Szayel tried for the double-play at first, but he threw the ball a little wildly, pulling Tousen off the base. Ikkaku ran with his head down, pulling for first with all the speed he had.

"Safe!" Lirin cried as he streaked across the base.

As Renji jogged dejectedly back to the dugout, Byakuya caught his eye. "It annoys me when you fail to consider the consequences of disobeying orders," he remarked. Renji ducked his head and flushed. He hurried into the dugout.

"Man!" Matsumoto whispered to Renji as he passed by. "He really reamed you a new one that time."

"I don't want to talk about it!" Renji slunk to the end of the dugout farthest from Byakuya.

"What a dramatic change in the situation for the Shinigami!" Urahara exclaimed. "They've gone from one out with a runner at second to two out with a runner at first. They still have a chance, but it doesn't look quite as promising."

"They can still pull it out," Yoruichi said. "Ganju's up next and he's two for two."

As Ganju came up to the plate, Gin trotted out to the mound. "Ya gotta be careful with this one, Grimmy. He's tagged ya pretty good twice."

"I know," Grimmjow growled.

"So stay focused. Let's get him." Gin trotted back to the plate and crouched down. He gave Grimmjow the sign. Grimmjow nodded.

The first pitch was a curveball and Ganju fouled it off. The ball smacked into the backstop with a loud clang. Hanataro dashed out to retrieve it and raced back to the dugout.

"Strike one!"

He fouled the next pitch into the left field stands and several Shinigami spectators scrambled for it.

"Strike two!"

Grimmjow tried a knuckleball and Ganju let it go by.

"Ball one!"

Gin offered a sign and Grimmjow shook his head. He offered another one and Grimmjow nodded with a sharp grin. He wound up quickly and blazed in a smoking fastball. Ganju started to swing but the ball zoomed past him and smacked into Gin's glove.

"Strike three! You're out!"

Ganju frowned and gripped his bat by the barrel as he jogged back to the dugout.

In the dugout, Renji tried to escape onto the field before Byakuya came in. He failed. Byakuya confronted him on the steps of the dugout with his arms crossed.

"We'll need to have a discussion after the game," Byakuya said without expression.

Renji would not meet his eyes. "Baseball's a tough sport! It's easy to make mistakes."

"I do not expect mistakes from my first officer."

"I'll make it right!" Renji dashed out of the dugout and ran to his position in center field.

"You shouldn't push him too hard," Shunsui murmured. "He might get reckless."

"Is it pushing to expect perfection?"

"We can't all be like you."

"I don't see why not." Byakuya blinked. "I don't find being perfect that difficult."

"So the end of the sixth inning finds us mired in a 5-5 tie," Urahara announced. "The Shinigami let a scoring opportunity slip away and the Arrancar have pulled even. I don't know about you Yoruichi, but I'm on the edge of my seat."

"You and most of the fans in the stadium," Yoruichi agreed. "This game's turning into a real nail-biter. But there will be a break in the action in the next inning, with the seventh inning stretch. So stay in your seats, folks! After the Arrancar at-bat, we have a little entertainment cooked up for you to get you ready for the rest of the game."


	7. Inning Seven

**Inning Seven**

"The Arrancar lead off the seventh with their number two batter, Nnoitra. He's two for three with a triple under his belt," Urahara announced.

"What's under his belt doesn't look like a triple to me," Yoruichi remarked. "Are you sure it's even a single?"

"What did she say?!" Nnoitra shouted, infuriated.

"I said your dick's the size of a…" Yoruichi started to shout back, but Urahara kicked the leg of her chair and she tumbled over backward. "Hey!"

"Let's see if Nnoitra can start something for the Arrancar," Urahara continued blandly.

Yoruichi scowled at him as she righted her chair and resumed her seat. "I may start something if you try that again," she grumbled.

Still frowning angrily, Nnoitra stepped up to the plate.

Ichigo looked him up and down pointedly. "She must be on to something, judging by your reaction. You are pretty thin for your height. Maybe you're thin everywhere?"

"Just shut up and pitch!" Nnoitra snarled.

"Ok!" Ichigo grinned fiercely as he took the sign from Ganju. The first pitch blew past Nnoitra untouched. "Feel free to swing at those."

"I'll swing when I'm damn good and ready!"

"Sure, sure," Ichigo chuckled. "Just checking."

The second pitch smoked by, and Nnoitra swung and missed. "Dammit!"

"Yeah, there must definitely be some kind of compensation going on there," Ichigo said.

"Look who's talking with your giant _zanpakuto_!" Grimmjow shouted from the dugout. "What are you compensating for?"

Ichigo's grin widened. "Oh, I'm just trying to make what I've got hanging look normal size when it's next to my _zanpakuto_. But I guess that means you need a tiny sword to make your little twig look bigger."

"I do not have a little twig!" Grimmjow screamed.

Gin put a hand on Grimmjow's shoulder. "Quit letting him get to ya. He's just trying to get ya rattled."

"But he keeps harping on it!"

"That's because it's the size of a harp string," Ichigo said as he wound up for the next pitch.

"That does it!" Grimmjow cried. "I'm gonna beat the shit out of him!"

Gin grabbed him around the waist to keep him from dashing out of the dugout. "Save it for after the game, Grimmy. Ya can beat up all the Shinigami ya want, then."

"You can count on that!" Grimmjow shook his fist at Ichigo. "You've got a butt-kicking coming, carrot-top!"

"Lookin' forward to it," Ichigo said. "But let me strike this guy out first."

"What?!" Nnoitra exclaimed. The pitch whistled in and he swung hard, but the ball popped foul behind the plate. Ganju quickly pulled his mask up, but the ball fell behind the backstop.

"Hmm…" Ichigo rubbed his chin and leaned in for the next sign. Ganju signaled and Ichigo nodded, his fierce grin returning. "Nice!" He took a long, slow wind-up and then exploded into the pitch. The fastball blurred in and Nnoitra swung hard, trying to crush the ball. He missed cleanly and the ball thumped loudly into Ganju's mitt. "Yes!"

"Crap!" Nnoitra cried. He slammed his bat into the ground and stamped back to the dugout. "You distracted me with your whining!" he snapped at Grimmjow.

"A skilled batter," Ulquiorra interrupted calmly, "can focus on the pitcher through any number of distractions." He blinked once and Nnoitra swallowed.

"Yes, of course," Nnoitra muttered. He slunk to a spot on the bench and sat down.

Ulquiorra glanced at Zommari. "I assume you will do better."

"Of course," Zommari said calmly. He strode confidently up to the plate and settled into his stance, his bat at the ready.

"Zommari has made contact at all three at-bats," Urahara announced, "but he only has one hit to show for it. Let's see how he does this time."

Ichigo took his time, but Zommari jumped on the first pitch, cracking it solidly into left field over Rukia's head. Chad caught the ball after the first bounce and threw it in to Ikkaku at second. Zommari stopped at first. Ichigo scowled as Ikkaku threw him the ball.

"That's one on and one out for the Arrancar," Urahara said. "They've got an opportunity here to break the tie."

Yammi stumped out of the dugout swinging his bat in wide arcs. "Get ready to run, Zommari!" he said. "I'm going to get a hit."

"Overconfident loud-mouth," Ichigo muttered. He pitched a breaking ball that dropped below the strike zone. Yammi let it go by.

"Ball one!"

"Right," Ichigo muttered. He tossed in another breaking ball and Yammi ignored this one, too.

"Ball two!"

Ichigo settled back for the third pitch, watching over his shoulder as Zommari took a lead off first base. He half-turned toward first and Zommari sidled back toward the base. Ichigo nodded and turned back to Yammi. Yammi watched him closely, taking a few easy swings while he waited. Ichigo wound up and Yammi got set. Ichigo pitched and Yammi swung hard. Obviously expecting a fastball, he was taken by surprise when the curveball broke outside. It was too late to hold up his swing and he tipped the ball, sending it bouncing down the first base line. Kenpachi scooped up the ball, tagged first and quickly threw to Ikkaku while Zommari was only half-way to second base. Zommari skidded to a stop when he saw Ikkaku with the ball and made a dash back for first. But Ikkaku threw the ball back to Kenpachi and the big captain tagged him out deftly as Zommari tried to slip around him.

"Wow!" Urahara exclaimed. "The Shinigami catch Zommari in a run-down to complete the double-play, and the Arrancar lose a chance to move ahead. That concludes the top half of the inning and now it's time for the seventh inning stretch. Since this isn't a professional baseball game and we're receiving free television coverage, the entertainment during the break will be hosted by TV personality Don Kanonji!"

"That quack?!" several Shinigami exclaimed.

"BWA-HA-HA!" roared the rest of the crowd, their hands clasping their shoulders.

"Hello, ladies and gentlemen!" Don Kanonji shouted. He bounded into the infield, his cape flying. "Spirits are always with you!"

"We're all spirits, you idiot!" someone shouted.

"I'm not," Ishida grumbled.

"But never fear!" Kanonji continued as if no one had spoken. "My Kurakara Superheroes are here to protect you with special prizes! Come out, Superheroes!"

One by one, Karin, Yuzu, Jinta and Ururu came onto the field, striking dramatic poses. Then Kon bounded out, his star-spangled blue cape flying, and began dancing on the pitcher's mound.

"I am the most fearsome Superhero!" Kon chanted as he leaped from foot to foot and waved his arms to either side, making odd squeaking noises with every step. He dropped to one knee and jabbed a paw into the air. "I am Godlike!"

"Oh, please!" Jinta groaned. "You're puny and you squeak."

"I do not!" Kon squeaked.

Kanonji flared his arms. "Ladies and gentlemen, prepare for a most exciting contest! My Superheroes are going to throw beach balls into the stands! You have to keep them moving while the music plays! But when the music stops, whoever is holding the beach ball gets a valuable prize! A protective spirit charm made by yours truly! Bwa-ha-ha!"

"What the hell are we supposed to do with a spirit charm?!" one Hollow demanded.

"You can stick it on the back of the stupid Hollow who keeps hogging all the peanuts!" a tiny Hollow grumbled as it tried, unsuccessfully and for about the twentieth time, to catch a bag of peanuts being thrown in his direction by a vendor before it was snagged by the same bulky Hollow.

"And for the Grand Prize," Kanonji continued, "one lucky person will get to spend the rest of the game in the luxury VIP box of his choice, hosted by either Yamamoto-Genryūsai, First Captain of the Shinigami, or Aizen Sousuke, leader of the Arrancar!"

"He calls that a grand prize?" Matsumoto exclaimed. "I wouldn't want to be stuck with either of those geezers."

"That's no way to talk about our venerable leader!" Hitsugaya scolded her. "And Aizen isn't old; he's just a stinking traitor."

"Yeah, how come the stinking traitor rates a luxury VIP box?" Renji demanded. "He should be sitting in the bleachers with his stinking Hollow buddies!"

Lounging in his luxury VIP box with his feet up, sipping Champagne and munching the most expensive sushi and sashimi being hand-cut for him by an attentive sushi chef, Aizen toasted them with his glass. "Treason has its rewards."

In the neighboring box, eating a plain rice ball and sipping green tea, Yamamoto-sensei made a face. "Honorless dog," he muttered.

Ganju scratched his head. "Well, if you ask me, sushi and Champagne sound better than rice balls and tea. I can have that any day. Aizen's box is looking pretty good."

Renji's face turned red. "You treasonous pig! We should kick you off the team!"

"Fresh sashimi does sound good," Shunsui murmured.

"You, too?!" Renji gasped.

Shunsui shrugged and grinned sheepishly. "Honor is often betrayed by the needs of the flesh."

"Not my honor!" Renji declared loudly. "The needs of my flesh are subject to an iron will!"

"And we know who's will that is," Ichigo remarked in a loud aside to Matsumoto. She snickered equally loudly.

Renji stuck his chin out and pointedly ignored them.

"Anyway," Ichigo continued, "I don't think we players get to participate in the contest. See? The balls are only in the stands."

Over the loud speakers, a bouncing, happy tune began to play and the fans started smacking the beach balls into the air. In total, ten balls bounced back and forth. Then the music abruptly stopped and there was a brief scramble as the balls were claimed.

"And we have our first winners!" Kanonji cried jubilantly. "Superheroes, distribute the prizes!"

Karin promptly slapped a spirit charm onto a soccer ball and kicked it at the nearest winner with deadly accuracy. Her ball smacked the unfortunate Shinigami square in the face and he toppled over like a felled tree. She quickly lined up two more balls. Meanwhile, Ururu shouldered her bazooka and rapid-fired four soccer balls into the stands, each with a spirit charm attached. The lucky recipients were knocked several rows back from their seats by their prizes. Not to be outdone, Yuzu slapped spirit charms onto the three remaining soccer balls and tossed them quickly into the air so Jinta could whack them with his oversize club toward the other winners who, unfortunately for them, failed to duck fast enough.

"And guess what!" Kanonji sang out. "You get to keep the soccer balls, too!" He waved his hand. "Start the music!"

"NO!" dozens of fans cried out in horror. "No more prizes!" There were now desperate attempts by all and sundry to knock the balls away at any cost. But sadly, the music stopped again and ten unlucky people were stuck holding beach balls. Even the bone-faced Hollows holding balls looked pale. "Please! I don't need a prize!" But those anguished pleas fell on deaf ears. More soccer balls zoomed into the stands, managing to hit even those winners who were trying in vain to hide under their seats or behind their neighbors.

"Now for the Grand Prize!" Kanonji shouted. "One lucky beach ball contains a Golden Ticket! Whoever has that ball when the music stops wins the Grand Prize!" He waved his hand and the music started again. Now fans batted the balls around with the hope of catching one when the music stopped. When it did stop, fights immediately broke out as eager fans tried to wrestle the balls away from each other. Of course, this resulted in all the balls getting popped. "Who has the Golden Ticket?" Kanonji called out. "Who's the lucky winner?"

"Me!" Asano leaped to his feet, managing to shove off three Shinigami and two Hollows in the process. He waved the Golden Ticket in the air.

"Lucky boy!" Kanonji cried. "Come here and let me congratulate you!"

Eagerly, Asano made his way down the stands and hopped onto the field. He jogged out to Kanonji, waving his ticket and grinning like an idiot. "I never win anything!" he squealed delightedly. "This is so cool!"

Kanonji put an arm around his shoulders. "Well done, my boy! Now, which VIP box would you like to visit? Yamamoto-sensei is an ancient wise man of limitless power! Aizen is a bottomless pool of evil who will drag you into hell! Which is it going to be?"

"Oh, that's a tough one," Asano said. His brow wrinkled with unaccustomed thought. "I think I'm gonna have to go with Aizen. I never get top quality sushi at home. And I've never had Champagne."

"You idiot, Asano!" Tatsuki screamed from the stands. "I'm not rescuing your ass when that monster eats your soul!"

"Now, now, there's nothing to fear," Aizen said with a paternal smile. "I never eat souls with Champagne."

"That doesn't make any sense!" Tatsuki shouted.

"Of course it does," Aizen replied urbanely. "All civilized people know you should drink red wine with souls."

"Augh!" Tatsuki slapped her forehead.

"All right, my boy!" Kanonji patted Asano on the back. "I'll escort you to the Arrancar luxury VIP box where you'll enjoy the rest of the game in lavish comfort. The rest of you lucky winners enjoy your prizes. And don't forget to watch my show!" He folded his arms over his chest and grabbed his shoulders. "Remember! The spirits are always with you! BWA-HA-HA!"

"BWA-HA-HA!" echoed the crowd.

Theme music began to play and the crowd sang along, blowing up long skinny balloons in a variety of colors as they sang. Soon the whole crowd was waving long balloons, their slightly bulbous ends bumping into each other suggestively.

Yoruichi blinked. "Whose idea was it to give the fans balloons?"

"Mine!" Urahara said. "I saw it in a game on TV once. I thought it was very amusing and would get the crowd worked up."

"I suppose so, if they're into inflatable sex toys."

"I don't mean that kind of worked up! I mean it gets you excited to see the rest of the game."

"Ah." Yoruichi blinked again. "And how does that relate to phallic balloons?"

"They're not phallic!"

"O…k…" Yoruichi pursed her lips and looked away.

The theme music built to a closing crescendo and with a shout, everyone released their balloons. The balloons zoomed around, expending their air and crashing to the ground, leaving the field and the stands littered with the brightly colored, deflated rubber tubes. Everyone cheered and the groundskeepers came out to clean the field.

"And with that exciting finish," Urahara announced happily, "it's on to the bottom of the seventh inning. The Shinigami will start at the bottom of the order with Matsumoto, who has an RBI single in her two at-bats."

Matsumoto swaggered up to the plate, but before stepping into the batter's box, she made a show of buttoning up her uniform slightly. The closed buttons strained across her bosom, but held. She grinned at Gin. "I don't want to be accused of trying to distract the pitcher with my rack, assuming he likes that sort of thing."

"Of course I like that sort of thing!" Grimmjow exclaimed before Gin could say anything.

"Oh, really?" Matsumoto's hand hovered over her buttons. "Would you like me to open it back up?"

"No!" Grimmjow snapped. "I'm just saying I appreciate a good pair of titties just as much as the next man!"

"Oh, well, in that case…" Matsumoto hefted her bat and settled into her stance.

Grimmjow focused on Gin to get the sign and then prepared for his wind-up. The first pitch was a knuckleball that flopped all over the place on its way to the plate.

Matsumoto stared at it as it went by. "What the hell do you call that pitch? Fish Dying in the Net?"

"I'd call it a strike," Gin chuckled.

"Um, strike one!" Isshin echoed apologetically.

"How could you tell?!" Matsumoto demanded. "It was at four different places at least on its way over the plate!"

"But one of them was in the strike zone," Isshin explained. "It just needs to pass through the strike zone and be over the plate at some point."

"So if it's going sideways, it still counts?!"

"I'm afraid so."

"That's just not right." Matsumoto resumed her stance, an irritated frown on her face.

Grimmjow threw another knuckleball and Matsumoto swung furiously at it. She topped the ball hard, sending it into a high bounce, and charged down the line at full speed. Grimmjow hopped off the mound and caught the ball on the way down, throwing Matsumoto out easily at first.

"What a stupid pitch!" Matsumoto complained as she returned to the dugout. "It shouldn't be allowed." She punched Ichigo's arm. "How come you don't throw that pitch?"

"Because knuckleball's are for sissies who can't throw a decent fastball," Ichigo replied. He plopped his bat on his shoulder and jogged out to the plate.

Grimmjow pressed his lips tightly closed and managed not to rise to the bait. But he kept shaking off Gin's signs, until Gin finally called time in exasperation. He jogged out to the mound.

"He's trying to get ya to throw the fastball," Gin whispered. "Don't fall for it. The knuckler's working, so let's stick with it."

"What about a curveball?"

"It's not your best pitch."

Grimmjow scowled. "All right, I'll stay away from the fastball."

"Good boy."

Gin jogged back to the plate and grinned at Ichigo. "Now then, let's get on with your strikeout."

"Heh!" Ichigo laughed. When the inevitable knuckleball came in, he jumped on the pitch, punching it hard toward left field. But Nnoitra dove for it and, with his long body, easily came up with the ball. He threw Ichigo out at first.

"Damn!" Ichigo muttered, "I almost got that one through." He clapped Hitsugaya on the shoulder as he jogged back to the dugout. "You see how it's done, right, Toushirou? His knuckleball's not that hard to hit."

"Of course I see it. And don't call me Toushirou!" Hitsugaya stamped out to the plate.

"He may not throw that pitch," Renji remarked. "With Hitsugaya-taicho's tiny little strike zone, it might be too hard to get a wild pitch like the knuckleball in."

"What did you call my strike zone?" Hitsugaya snarled.

"Tiny," Renji replied calmly.

"I'd say it's more petite," Ganju put in. "Like his delicate little hands."

"WHAT?!"

"They're all soft and pretty, like a woman's," Ganju added helpfully.

Hitsugaya dropped his bat and started back for the dugout. "Let me hear you say that while my delicate little hands are choking the life out of you!"

"Get back to the plate, Hitsugaya-taicho!" Yachiru ordered sternly. "There's nothing wrong with having delicate, pretty hands." She held up her tiny little appendages. "See? Aren't mine adorable?"

"Very cute!" Everyone in the dugout immediately agreed.

Still muttering under his breath, Hitsugaya returned to the plate and picked up his bat.

Grimmjow, his arms crossed and an amused grin plastered on his face, came to attention. "You ready now?"

"Yeah, just pitch the damn ball!"

Grimmjow immediately threw a fastball straight down the middle of the plate.

"Strike one!"

Wisely, everyone in the Shinigami dugout kept their mouths shut.

Grimmjow wound up for another pitch and floated in a high breaking ball. Hitsugaya pounded it hard straight at Zommari. He was thrown out at first by several paces.

Hitsugaya stormed back to the dugout to get his glove. "Does anyone want to talk about the size of my glove? Because if so, you can find out how big it is when I whack it up the side of your head!"

"No, we're good!" Everyone scurried about getting their own gloves and preparing to run back onto the field.

"Well, Yoruichi, that was an exciting seventh inning!" Urahara exclaimed. "I can't wait for the start of the eighth. I think these teams have some fireworks in store for us."

"Just as long as it's not more balloons," Yoruichi muttered. "That was a bit much."


	8. Inning Eight

**Inning Eight**

"It's the top of the eighth and we still have a 5-5 tie between these two well-matched teams," Urahara announced. "The tension is really starting to get to this crowd, wouldn't you say, Yoruichi?"

"Absolutely, Urahara," Yoruichi agreed. "In fact, those two fans over there seem really tense." She pointed into the stands, where a wiry Hollow covered in long whip-like tentacles had one of his longest tentacles wrapped around the neck of a stocky Shinigami at the edge of a neighboring section. The Shinigami was starting to turn blue. "Perhaps this is a good time to mention that murdering opposing fans might cause a delay of game."

The attacking Hollow reluctantly unwound his tentacle and retracted it. "He had it coming!" the Hollow grumbled. "My tentacles do not look like spaghetti!"

"Um, yeah, ok," Yoruichi said. She lifted her eyebrows and mouthed the words "Yes they do" at Urahara.

Urahara just blinked. "First up for the Arrancar is Stark. He's two for three with a home run. Stark has a lot of power when he chooses to use it."

Stark stepped out of the dugout blinking sleepily.

Ulquiorra touched his elbow. "I think it would be better for all concerned, especially you, if you did not return to the dugout too quickly."

All the sleepiness went out of Stark's expression. "Ah… so, you want me to get a hit?"

"Yes. It's always good for the team when the first batter gets a hit." Ulquiorra regarded Stark without blinking.

"I can do that," Stark agreed hastily. He scurried to the plate. "Man, that guy creeps me out," he whispered to Ganju.

Ganju nodded. "He's pretty stern. I hope he doesn't slit you open when we strike you out."

"You wouldn't do that to a poor fellow, would you?" Stark pleaded. "How about an easy single?"

"That doesn't really work for us."

"What is this, a competition?"

"Well, yeah."

"Fine! I'll just get a hit on my own." Stark peeked over his shoulder at the dugout. "Because I'm not going back in there any sooner than I have to."

"If you insist." Ganju gave Ichigo a sign. Ichigo wound up and pitched a sharp curveball. Stark managed to get a good piece of it and sent a high bouncing ball into right center field. Hitsugaya blazed over to pick it up and Stark stopped at first with a pleased smile on his face.

"Now if the rest of them get out I can't be blamed," Stark said.

"Sure you can," Kenpachi disagreed cheerfully. "If you get thrown out at second because you're too slow, I'm sure your manager will want to discuss that with you." He grinned delightedly at Stark.

Stark rubbed the back of his head. "That's not a good thought." He took a lead off first. "If you'll excuse me…"

Kenpachi laughed loudly. "Go right ahead."

Grimmjow swaggered to the plate. "I don't need threats to remind me to kick your sorry ass!" he crowed at Ichigo. "We'll see who has the biggest balls when the game's over and we've won!"

"You offering me a quickie?" Ichigo sneered.

"That's not what I said!" Grimmjow screamed back.

"I don't normally swing that way," Ichigo continued as if Grimmjow hadn't spoken, "but if you're real deep, I might make an exception."

Grimmjow's face turned crimson and he twisted his fists around the handle of his bat. "Just pitch the ball!" he growled.

Still smirking, Ichigo treated him to a speedy 350 mph fastball. Grimmjow swung with a loud grunt, but he missed. The next pitch was also a fastball, but this time Grimmjow was all over it. He smacked the ball deep into left center field and Renji had to play it off the wall. Stark was already well off first, so he blew past second and ran like the wind for third. Seeing that, Grimmjow turned on the jets and streaked for second.

"Yeah, just ignore me," Halibel mumbled as he rounded first without even looking at her.

Renji fired the ball in and Grimmjow dove for second head-first, his arms outstretched. Ikkaku took the throw with his back to Grimmjow, so he just swept his glove down hard, feeling for a hand. He clouted Grimmjow solidly right on the bony side of his face.

"Ow!" Grimmjow cried.

"Oops!" Ikkaku tried to look innocent.

"Safe!" Noba said, his little arms flared out.

Grimmjow scowled at Ikkaku as he stood up, dusting off his uniform. "You did that on purpose."

"Any part of the base runner is fair game for a tag," Ikkaku explained unconvincingly. "Besides, it's not like it's gonna bruise there."

"It still hurts!"

"Don't be such a wuss!"

Byakuya lifted an eyebrow at Ichigo. "Perhaps you should stop antagonizing him. He seems to do better when you make references to his inadequate manhood."

"He's just compensating!" Ichigo growled.

"His compensation may cost us the game," Byakuya pointed out. "Try to keep focused on the task at hand. After all, the size of his genitals is irrelevant."

"Maybe to you!" Matsumoto laughed. "There may be others who care!"

"Can we stop discussing my private parts?!" Grimmjow shouted. "It's not like they're hanging out there to be the topic of your conversation!"

"Are you sure?" Matsumoto grinned. "How can we tell?" She eyed him with amusement.

Grimmjow clenched his fists and gritted his teeth to keep from responding.

"I like him!" Yoruichi said. "He sure is fun to tease."

Urahara just shook his head. "The Shinigami are in trouble now. With the first two batters making solid contact, Ichigo needs to get three outs without letting any runs score. This could be tough."

At the plate, Tousen faced Ichigo patiently. Scowling, Ichigo shook off the first two signs before accepting the third. He held his stance for a long time, checking the base runners multiple times before starting his wind up. The first pitch was a curveball outside.

"Ball one!"

The second pitch was low and inside, forcing Tousen to pull back slightly to avoid being hit.

"Ball two!"

The third pitch was a breaking ball over the plate. It would have been low too, but Tousen dropped his shoulders and smacked it right over Rukia's head. Rukia jumped for it, but it cleared her outstretched glove by at least twenty centimeters.

"Crap!" Rukia swore uncharacteristically.

Stark made it home standing up.

Luppi waved Grimmjow around third, even though Chad was fielding the ball on a clean bounce. "Move it, Grimmjow!" Luppi shouted. "You can beat the throw!"

Grimmjow pounded down the line with his head down. Once again, he dove in head first when Luppi shouted at him to slide. The ball came in past his shoulder as dust billowed up around him. The throw was a little high and Ganju had to pull the ball down a long way. He slammed his glove into the back of Grimmjow's head.

"Safe!" Isshin shouted.

"Ow!" Grimmjow shouted.

"Goddamit!" Ichigo shouted.

"Oh, no!" the Shinigami fans groaned.

"Yay!" the Hollow fans screamed wildly.

"And the Arrancar are up by two on Tousen's long single!" Urahara announced excitedly.

"He could have stretched that into a double with the play going to home," Yoruichi sniffed. "Pussy traitor."

"Time!" Yachiru called loudly. She trotted out to the mound and stared up at Ichigo with her little arms crossed. "What are you doing, poppy-head? Do you like letting them hit the ball?"

"No!"

"So stop it!" She kicked him in the shin.

"Ow!" When he bent over to rub the place she kicked, she rapped him on the top of the head with her knuckles. "Use your brain, silly. I assume you've got one. Throw pitches they can't hit." She made her eyes go big. "You don't want me to have to replace you, do you? That would make me so sad."

Ichigo rolled his eyes. "No, I don't want you to replace me. I'll get the next three out, ok?"

She grinned happily. "Ok!" Yachiru trotted back to the dugout.

Ichigo drew a deep breath.

Standing at the plate leaning on his bat, Gin grinned at him. "Feelin' the strain, are ya? Well, it's tough bein' a human around all this greatness."

"What greatness?" Ichigo smirked, putting his usual I've-got-it-under-control expression back on. "I'm more than enough for this lot."

"Oh, really?" Gin settled into his stance, still grinning. The infield inched forward, thinking bunt. Gin's grin got wider and he took a hard swing at the first pitch, but missed. Everyone quickly backed up. But after the next two pitches went by without him moving, they all inched back in again. Gin tried another full swung and missed again, but it moved the infield back. On the next pitch, Gin brought the bat around quickly, but then softly bunted the ball back toward Ichigo.

Unfortunately, it had a little more speed on it than he wanted. Ichigo flew off the mound and scooped the ball up in his bare hand, but instead of throwing to first, he whirled, jumped and threw the ball to Rukia as she streaked toward second from her position at shortstop. Rukia skimmed over the base with the ball in her hand two steps ahead of Tousen and blazed it to first in stride. Ken stretched for it and caught the ball a half-step ahead of Gin.

"He's out!" Lirin declared with high-pitched finality.

"Whoa!" Yoruichi cried. "That was a pretty double-play off the bunt!"

"It sure was!" Urahara agreed. "And the Shinigami have two quick outs, with Wonderweiss coming to the plate. Wonderweiss had one good hit, but then got out on a base running error."

On his way back to the dugout, Tousen veered over to collect Wonderweiss out of the batting circle. He led Wonderweiss to the plate by one hand, while Wonderweiss trailed his bat in the dirt with the other. Tousen leaned over and looked him in the eye. "Now do just like last time," he said. "Hit the ball with the bat."

Wonderweiss nodded enthusiastically. "Ahh!"

"That was very good. We were all quite pleased."

"Aaooo!" Wonderweiss cooed. Then he giggled. Tousen patted his shoulder and headed back to the dugout. Wonderweiss blinked at Ichigo and waggled his bat in the air. "Bat!"

"Yeah," Ichigo said. "You have a bat." He threw a breaking ball and Wonderweiss hit it right over his head. The ball bounced over second and Ikkaku dashed out to get it. Wonderweiss watched him chase the ball with wide eyes.

"Run, you idiot!" Luppi screamed.

Wonderweiss dropped his bat and started running toward Luppi.

Luppi smacked his forehead. "Not to me, you jackass! That way!" He pointed toward first.

Wonderweiss stumbled to a halt and stared at first. "Butterfly?"

By this time, of course, Ikkaku had the ball. He threw it to Kenpachi, even though Isshin and all three base umpires were making signs that Wonderweiss was out.

Luppi groaned. He caught Wonderweiss by the hand and took him back to the dugout. "I'm just not gonna say a word," he muttered. "Not a single word."

The Shinigami players ran in and the Arrancar players jogged out onto the field.

"That was, uh, an interesting finish to the Arrancar's at-bat," Urahara announced. "But they scored two runs and are now leading by a score of seven to five as we enter the bottom of the eighth. First up for the Shinigami is Rukia."

Matsumoto leaned on the dugout railing and smiled wistfully. "Rukia brings such grace to baseball. She's so feminine and so powerful at the same time. That's what baseball needs: more women players."

"That's a great idea!" Ganju agreed. "I love watching girls' jugs bounce when they're running!"

"What?!"

"Oh yeah!" Ganju's gaze became reverent. "The way they jiggle around and sway back and forth! It's just inspiring! You can't go wrong when there's bouncing titties to stare at!"

Matsumoto pursed her lips. "Like this?" She shoved her ample bosom into his face.

"Now that's what I'm talkin' about!" Ganju sighed and he nestled his face into the creamy white flesh.

"Uh, Ganju?" Hanataro spoke up. "That might not be a good idea."

"Hm?" Ganju mumbled blissfully. He tried to pull away and discovered he was stuck, because Matsumoto was mashing her boobs with both hands. His face was trapped. "Mmm!" He struggled to push free.

"Matsumoto," Ichigo said calmly. "Do you mind not suffocating our catcher?"

"He deserves it! Making such disrespectful remarks about the virtuous Rukia."

"I don't think he was talking about Rukia's tits," Ichigo said. "She hasn't got any."

"Don't you start!"

"I'm just sayin'."

"Shall we watch the game?" Hitsugaya interrupted loudly. "We're behind and Rukia has two strikes already."

"What?!" Matsumoto ejected the gasping and red-faced Ganju from her cleavage. "They're pitching already?"

"Yes, which you would have noticed if you had not gotten all wrapped up in something as unimportant as a woman's mammary attachments."

Matsumoto thrust out her chest. "My mammary attachments are NOT unimportant."

"Come on, Matsumoto," Ichigo said, "you can hardly expect a little kid like Toushirou to appreciate a woman's endowments. You gotta wait for his balls to drop."

"I am not a little kid!"

"Sure, kid."

"When this game is over," Hitsugaya grumbled, "I'm going to help Grimmjow beat the shit out of you."

At the plate, apparently oblivious to the animosity and near-death experience in her dugout, Rukia faced Grimmjow, waiting patiently for the next pitch. Grimmjow was pitching to her very carefully, keeping the ball on the edges of the plate. But then he tried one down the middle and she punched it over his head and into center field. Yammi came in for it quickly and she pulled up at first.

"Nice lead-off hit, Rukia!" Ichigo shouted encouragingly.

Kenpachi stepped out of the on-deck circle swinging a bat with Yachiru clinging to the barrel.

"Now relax, Ken-chan!" Yachiru ordered. "Just take a deep breath, focus on the ball, and hit it."

"Right!" Kenpachi peeled her off his bat and set her on the ground. "I can do this!" He marched to the plate and took several hard swings. "I'm ready!"

Grimmjow tried his knuckleball, but Kenpachi wasn't fooled this time. He jumped on the first pitch and cracked it deep into center field. Yammi raced for the fence and jumped, using the wall to give himself more height. He caught the ball at the top of the fence, to the infinite relief of the Hollow crowd.

Kenpachi skidded to a halt half-way to second with a disappointed groan. He slumped back to the dugout, where Yachiru hopped onto his shoulder. She patted him on the head. "Don't worry about it, Ken-chan! That was good contact. You'll get the next one out."

"But there's only one more inning! I probably won't get another at-bat!"

"Don't talk like that!" Yachiru admonished. "We'll tie the game and it will go into extra innings."

Kenpachi brightened. "Do you think so? That would be good. Then we can keep fighting. I hate it when the fighting's over."

Renji went to the plate trying to avoid eye contact with Byakuya. Byakuya, however, watched Renji closely with his arms crossed. Renji let the first pitch go by and heaved a small sigh of relief when it was a ball. He let the second pitch go by, too, but shuddered slightly when it was declared a strike. His eyes flicked to Byakuya and back to Grimmjow.

"I sure hope Renji doesn't make Byakuya resort to words," Matsumoto said. "It could get ugly. He might cry."

Renji caught the third pitch solidly and sent it screaming into deep left center field. Wonderweiss, to no one's surprise, was completely unaware of the approaching ball. Yammi, on the other hand, was pounding across the outfield, desperately trying to get there in time. At the last minute, he leaped, stretching all the way out with his glove hand extended, and just caught the ball on the tip of the glove. He hit the ground hard, skidded on his belly for a second, and then rolled over. But he kept his gloved hand in the air the whole time, with the ball clutched in the top of the webbing. He popped to his feet to the thunderous applause from the Hollow crowd.

"What a spectacular catch, Yoruichi!" Urahara announced. "I didn't think the big Arrancar would get there in time."

Hopeful that the ball would drop, Rukia had started running to second, but now she raced back to first. Byakuya merely glanced at her, his completely smooth expression radiating approval to the discerning eye. But then he turned his flat, expressionless gaze on Renji. Renji froze in his tracks. Then he started inching sideways toward the dugout, careful not to turn his back on Byakuya.

"Ok, now Byakuya really reminds me of Ulquiorra," Yoruichi said. "He looks like he's picking out the best spots for a quick, thorough flaying." She rubbed her chin. "There's an interesting question. Who do you think would flay a victim faster: Byakuya or Ulquiorra?"

"Oh, Ulquiorra, definitely," Urahara replied, "but I think Byakuya would end up with the more aesthetically pleasing result."

Yoruichi lifted an eyebrow. "An aesthetically pleasing flaying?"

"It's all in the blood spatter."

"I see." Yoruichi pursed her lips. "You need to get out more."

"So, the Shinigami have one on and one out with Chad coming to the plate," Urahara announced.

Grimmjow watched Chad arrive silently at the plate. "Do you ever speak?"

Chad nodded.

"So say something!"

Chad blinked at him. "Uh... pitch the ball."

"Sheesh!" Grimmjow rolled his eyes. He took the sign from Gin and prepared to pitch the ball. Chad fouled the first pitch into the left field stands, were several Shinigami fans scrambled for the ball.

"It's mine!" Tatsuki shouted and she dove into the pile. Shinigami started flying out of the pile as she flung them heartlessly aside. "Aha!" Tatsuki surged to her feet with the ball clutched proudly in her fist. "I've got my souvenir of the game!" She hurried back to her seat, while the Shinigami who thought they had a chance at the ball were left with nothing but bruises.

"That girl's tough!" one of them muttered.

"She's not beautiful," Ayasegawa sniffed. "Not like my lovely Ikkaku. He'll be at bat next."

The neighboring Shinigami stuffed their fingers in their ears.

The next pitch to Chad was a sinking fastball and he managed to get under it, looping the ball into right center field. Looking very put out, Stark jogged in to get it and Chad stopped at first. Shunsui held Rukia up at second.

Now Ikkaku came to the plate, a sheen of sweat gleaming on his bald head. His sleeves were rolled down and his shirt was properly buttoned. "It's hot!" he complained.

"I'm tired of you players not wearing your uniforms correctly," Isshin retorted.

"You didn't seem to care when Matsumoto's tits were spilling out in your face!"

"Well," Isshin fanned himself, "one has to take certain physical limitations into account. Just deal with it."

Ikkaku mumbled something that should probably have gotten him ejected. He stepped up to the plate and glared at Grimmjow. Ikkaku swung awkwardly at the first pitch and missed it. "You see?!" he exclaimed to Isshin. "I can't swing properly with all this material binding my muscles."

"It's still a strike," Isshin said flatly.

Swearing under his breath, Ikkaku returned his attention to Grimmjow. The next pitch was high, but Ikkaku hit it anyway. It popped up high into center field and Yammi moved under it easily.

"Man!" Yammi exclaimed when he caught the ball. "Doesn't anyone else have to play? I'm the only one who did anything this inning."

"I was pitching this whole time!" Grimmjow pointed out.

"Yeah, well next time, get them to hit the balls to someone else. I'm tired!"

"Well, that's got to be disappointing for the Shinigami," Urahara announced. "They had two on, but failed to capitalize on it. So the Arrancar hold onto their two run lead as we head into the ninth. I'm on the edge of my seat here, and I know everyone else is, too, Yoruichi. This is one hell of a game!"

"It sure is, Urahara, and the Shinigami are running out of chances. But before we move on, let's check in on our lucky Grand Prize winner and see if he's still alive, um, I mean, enjoying himself, in the Arrancar luxury VIP box with former Shinigami captain and paragon of evil Aizen Sousuke."

Now wearing a finely woven yukata, a slightly drunk Asano toasted them with his Champagne flute. He was comfortably reclined on a divan next to Aizen, propped up on silk pillows, with a plate of sashimi at his fingertips. "I'm havin' a great time!" Asano called out. "This is the best prize I've ever won!"

Aizen watched him with an amused smile on his face. "We'll have even more fun later," he purred. "I have a few more diverting entertainments planned for after the game."

"That sounds great!" Asano sipped his wine happily.

"That idiot's gonna get himself killed!" Tatsuki grumbled.

"But he'll probably die happy," Ishida said.

"Not if I can help it!" Tatsuki declared. "If anyone gets to kill that idiot, it's me!" She shook her fist at Aizen. "You better not do anything worse than violate his backside!"

"What?" Asano asked blurrily.

"I wouldn't think of it," Aizen said, his smile widening. He put an arm around Asano and offered him a nibble of sushi. Asano ate it eagerly and Aizen lifted his eyebrows at Tatsuki. "He won't even have a bruise. I promise."

Tatsuki groaned and covered her eyes. "That fool Asano has no idea what he's in for."


	9. Inning Nine

**Inning Nine**

"The Arrancar are taking a 7-5 lead into the ninth with the top of their lineup coming to bat," Urahara announced. "It's coming down to the wire for the Shinigami."

"Yeah," Yoruichi said. "These Shinigami better pull it together and put some runs on the board or they're going to have a lot of explaining to do back in Soul Society."

Urahara checked the stats. "Szayel is one for four today, but he might have been two for four if he wasn't batting behind Wonderweiss."

Yoruichi chuckled. "But you gotta admit, that little Arrancar has added a lot of excitement to the game."

"Yes, if by excitement you mean unpredictability."

"Predictability is for boring people."

Szayel arrived at the plate with a sneer on his face. "This is the beginning of the end for you, human," he said to Ichigo. "We're going to take such a decisive lead that you'll have no chance of catching up."

"You know what I'll like best when this game is over?" Ichigo drawled back. "Not having to listen to the idiot whining of all you damn Arrancar. You are the whiniest bunch of pussies I've ever had to waste a day with."

"Just pitch the ball," Szayel snapped back, "and we'll see who whines more."

Szayel ignored the first two pitches, but he swung hard at the third. The ball bounced between Rukia and Matsumoto and rolled into left field. Chad came up with it quickly and Halibel held Szayel up at first. Ichigo scowled as Rukia tossed him the ball.

"It's ok, Ichigo," Rukia said. "Stay on top of them."

"Right." Ichigo faced Nnoitra, who was wearing his customary superior smirk.

"Szayel tagged you pretty good there," Nnoitra said.

"That puny little thing?" Ichigo replied with a shrug. He glanced at Szayel on first and then went into his windup. Nnoitra cracked the first pitch right over Ichigo's head, but the ball started curving into left center field. Renji had to run to get to it as it rolled toward the wall. Szayel rounded second without slowing down and slid into third easily. With his long body, Nnoitra stretched way out in his slide and beat the throw into second by inches.

"Dammit!" Ichigo growled.

Ganju trotted out to the mound. "You're losing some speed off your fastball," he noted.

Ichigo frowned. "My shoulder's starting to hurt," he muttered. "But I'll be damned if I let these assholes beat me."

"Why don't we stick to the curveball for now? You've been fooling them with that pretty well."

"I guess."

Ganju returned to the plate, where Zommari was waiting not terribly patiently. "It looks like your boy is falling apart."

"He's got enough left," Ganju chuckled.

In the announcer's booth, Yoruichi leaned way forward in her chair. "Come on, Ichigo! Show us what you got!"

"Ichigo has pitched himself into a little trouble," Urahara announced. "He's got runners at second and third with no outs. I don't see how he can get out of this without giving up at least one run."

The first pitch to Zommari was a curveball that just caught the outside corner.

"Strike one!"

Zommari frowned at Isshin, but said nothing.

The next pitch was inside, but also managed to catch a corner of the plate.

"Strike two!"

Zommari stepped back and regarded Isshin with annoyance. "Are you quite sure about that?"

"I call 'em like I see 'em," Isshin replied calmly.

Zommari sniffed in disbelief and stepped back into the batter's box. The third pitch was another curveball outside and Zommari swung sharply at this one. He caught it off the end of the bat and it bounced slowly toward Kenpachi. The big man charged forward to get it, but it was still too late to get Szayel. He streaked toward home and slid over the plate in a cloud of dust, so Kenpachi did not even try for the play there. He turned and tossed the ball to Ichigo, who was backing him up at first. Ichigo caught the ball and skipped across the base a step ahead of Zommari. Nnoitra stopped at third.

Byakuya lifted an eyebrow. "Good decision, Zaraki, to go for the sure out."

In the outfield, Renji scrubbed a hand over his face. "He praises everybody but me. It's not fair."

"Ichigo manages to get one out," Urahara announced, "but the run still scored. With two outs to go and another runner on third, the Shinigami are still in a lot of trouble."

Yoruichi eyed Urahara. "Whose side are you on, anyway?"

"I'm an announcer, so I'm unbiased," Urahara replied archly. "I just enjoy a good game of baseball."

"And the fact that all the refreshments for sale here today came from your shop has nothing to do with it."

"I provided the refreshments as a public service."

"For a nominal fee, I suppose."

"A very nominal fee." Urahara grinned. "I'm barely making any profit at all."

Yoruichi glared suspiciously. "So was this whole thing your idea?"

"Not entirely." Urahara cleared his throat. "With one on and one out, the big man Yammi comes to the plate. Yammi is zero for four with a sacrifice fly."

Yammi grinned hugely at Ichigo. "I'm going to get a hit this time!" he declared. He took a couple of big practice swings.

Ichigo just wrinkled his nose and prepared for the first pitch. Yammi fouled it off, sending fans into a mad scramble for the ball. He fouled the second pitch down the first base line, where it bounced off the wall right where Hanataro was sitting. Hanataro scooted out of the way with a yelp, and then he ran down the line to retrieve it. When he picked it up, a long-necked Hollow with big blue eyes leaned out of the stands.

"Let me have the ball, kid," the blue-eyed Hollow wheedled.

"I don't think I should do that," Hanataro replied nervously.

"Oh, come on! No one will care! You won't get in any trouble! Just toss it to me!"

Hanataro shook his head and backed up a few steps.

"Give me the stupid ball!"

"Don't give him the ball!" a neighboring Hollow called out. "He'll just eat it."

"I will not! I want a souvenir!"

"Hah! You ate the souvenir bat you talked me into buying."

"I didn't eat it!" the blue-eyed Hollow said defensively. "I was just... sort of gnawing on it."

"You ate it!"

Hanataro sidled away from the arguing Hollows and scurried back down the line to his seat.

At the plate, Yammi now had two strikes and one ball. He watched Ichigo wind up for the next pitch carefully. The breaking ball didn't break quite enough and Yammi got his bat under it. He hit it hard but not very high, although it was high enough to clear the leaping Kenpachi. The ball took a big bounce into left field and Hitsugaya had to wait for it. Nnoitra made it home standing up, but Halibel stopped Yammi at first.

"I could have made it to second!" Yammi complained.

"Have you not been watching the little guy throw?" Halibel retorted flatly. "You'd have been out by a mile."

"Did she just call me the little guy?!" Hitsugaya demanded angrily.

"She's just stating a fact," Renji responded.

"I'm a Shinigami captain!" Hitsugaya growled. "My physical stature is not representative of my enormous spiritual size."

"Yeah, yeah." Renji waved a dismissive hand.

"I swear I'm kicking everybody's butt after the game!" Hitsugaya muttered darkly.

Stark slouched up to the plate with a yawn. "I can't believe this game is still going on! What have we played, like, fifteen innings? I've missed about ten naps."

"We've got 'em on the ropes, Stark!" Grimmjow shouted. "Keep hammering him! He's losing it!"

Ichigo scowled. "I can finish this!" He blazed in a fastball and Stark swung late.

"Strike one!"

Stark grinned sheepishly at his dugout and settled in for the next pitch. Another fastball and another strike, but this time he did not even swing.

"You're not even trying!" Grimmjow screamed.

Stark smacked the next pitch down the left field line, but it curved foul and bounced into the stands before Chad could reach it. Grimmjow scrubbed a hand over his face. The next pitch was a curveball outside and Stark let it go by.

"Ball one!"

Ichigo made a face. He took the sign from Ganju and did a full windup. Obviously expecting a fastball, Stark started to swing as soon as the ball left Ichigo's hand, but then he tried hard to pull up when a breaking ball floated off Ichigo's fingers. He ended up twisted around with his hips pointing toward Ichigo and his shoulders still square in the batter's box. The ball dropped down untouched through his strike zone.

"Strike three! Batter's out!"

"Well, dang!" Stark exclaimed. He slouched back to the dugout. Ulquiorra lifted an eyebrow at him. "I misjudged the pitch!" Stark said defensively. "It happens!"

"Hmm," was all Ulquiorra said.

Stark sat at the other end of the dugout.

Grimmjow stalked out to the plate with a triumphant smile splitting his face. "We're four up on you, Kurosaki! What do you think of that?"

"I think we're gonna shell you and win when it's our turn," Ichigo replied with an equally fierce grin. "You up for it?"

"I'm always up for it!" Grimmjow stepped into the batter's box, his bat held high.

Ichigo wound up and delivered a smoking fastball. Grimmjow didn't bite and let the ball thump untouched into Ganju's mitt.

"Strike one!"

Grimmjow laughed. "Why don't you give me another one just like that?"

"You think it'll make a difference if you know what's coming?" Ichigo sneered. "You'll still miss."

"Just try it and see," Grimmjow snapped back. "I'll put it in the bleachers."

"You think so, eh?" Ichigo did a fast wind-up and pitch, but the fastball was actually high. Grimmjow swung hard, already committed to the pitch, and he tried to adjust mid-swing for the unexpected height of the ball. He managed to get a good piece of it, but not enough. The ball floated out into right field and Hitsugaya drifted under it casually.

"Goddammit!" Grimmjow growled, slowing to a halt about halfway down the first base line as Hitsugaya caught the ball.

"So it looks like I was right," Ichigo said.

"I still hit it!" Grimmjow declared angrily. "You said I would miss!"

"Close enough. You're still out."

"But we're still winning! When I strike your side out and you go home losers, we know which one of us the fans will be celebrating."

"Yeah, me," Ichigo smirked, "because I'm hung like a man, not a pre-pubescent boy."

"What?!" Grimmjow screamed. He charged at the mound in a fury. "I'm not taking anymore of your snide remarks about the size of my dick!" He tackled Ichigo on the mound and the pair went down in a tangle.

"Cut it out!" Isshin shouted. "No fighting or you both get ejected!"

"I'm not fighting!" Ichigo protested as he protected his face from Grimmjow's pummeling with his glove.

Ulquiorra sighed. "Go get him, Yammi."

"Yes, sir!" Yammi jogged out to the mound and plucked Grimmjow off of Ichigo. "You're pissing Ulquiorra off."

"Well,_ he's_ pissing me off!" Grimmjow cried, struggling to grab Ichigo again.

"We need you for the bottom of the inning, Grimmjow," Yammi pointed out reasonably. "If you get ejected, how can you strike them all out and win the game?"

Grimmjow stopped struggling. "Fine! But I reserve the right to beat his skinny orange-headed ass to a pulp later!"

Yammi slung Grimmjow over a shoulder. "I'm sure he'll be glad to accommodate you."

"You got that right, bone-face," Ichigo said. He jogged back to the dugout. "That guy sure is fun."

"You make a good couple," Renji snickered. "You should date."

"Nah, I like 'em a little less girly."

Renji laughed out loud.

"Well, the Arrancar have really put the Shinigami's back against the wall with that performance," Urahara announced. "It should be exciting to see how the Shinigami respond to the situation."

"We Shinigami are fighters!" Yoruichi responded. "I'm expecting a big comeback."

"Boo!" the Hollow fans howled. "Kick that biased announcer out of the booth!"

"What are you whining about?" a Shinigami fan shouted back. "Your team's winning! Who cares what the announcer says?"

"Announcers should be unbiased!"

"She's the color announcer for the home team! She doesn't have to be unbiased!"

"How come you're the home team, then?! None of us live in this plane of existence!"

"But we're much closer to human than you soulless monsters are! So clearly, we are the home team!" The Shinigami puffed out his chest.

"But our leader is the same as you!" a Hollow shouted back.

"What leader?" the Shinigami sneered. "There's nobody in your VIP box!"

"What?!"

Everyone looked up at the Arrancar luxury VIP box. It was completely empty. Even the sushi chef was gone.

Tatsuki smacked her forehead. "I warned him! That Aizen guy is probably sucking his soul out right now!"

"He's probably sucking something, anyway," Ishida muttered under his breath.

"Well, he'll get no sympathy from me when he turns up dead!" Tatsuki concluded with a loud sniff.

"How about if he shows up with a really sore butt?" Ishida smirked.

"Then I'll kick him in it!"

"You're a caring friend."

"Damn right!"

A fat Hollow with long white fur all over its back jumped up. "Our leader didn't need to stay because he knows victory is assured! Our Arrancar will beat your stupid Shinigami team every day of the week!"

"That shows how much you know!" the Shinigami shouted back. "Hollow is just another term for airhead!"

"What?!" Several Hollows jumped to their feat and started for the Shinigami. Several Shinigami jumped up in response, more than ready to start a fight.

"Ladies and gentlemen!" Urahara announced loudly. "Please restore order in the stands immediately or my loyal and caring staff will be forced to hand out more prizes!"

Everyone froze in their tracks. Ururu quickly shouldered her bazooka and Jinta swung his heavy club eagerly. After a moment of hesitation, Hollows and Shinigami both scurried back to their seats.

"I already won a prize," one Shinigami muttered. "I don't think I could survive winning another one."

When the fans were all back in their seats, the Arrancar players jogged out onto the field.

"All right," Urahara said, "let's get on with the game. It's the bottom of the ninth, and it's make or break time for the Shinigami. They're starting at the bottom of their lineup with Ganju."

"I think I should resent the way that sounds," Ganju said with a frown.

"Alright, Grimmy, stay sharp," Gin said. "Just three quick outs and it's over."

Grimmjow nodded and wound up for the first pitch. He stuck with his knuckleball and Ganju watched the first one go by with raised eyebrows.

"I still can't get used to the way that thing moves," Ganju said.

Grimmjow pitched another knuckleball and Ganju cracked it straight at Nnoitra. Nnoitra threw him out easily at first.

"That's ok!" Yachiru called encouragingly. "That's just one out. We're still in it."

Matsumoto arrived at the plate with most of her majestic chest shoved into her uniform top. The uniform looked like it was not going to take the strain for much longer. She took a few slow swings in the batter's box while she watched Grimmjow take the sign from Gin. Grimmjow pitched a hard slider and Matsumoto took a big swing that was not even close to the ball. Her uniform promptly gave up the ghost. Buttons shot in all directions and several pounds of creamy white bosom spilled free.

"Oops!" Matsumoto exclaimed.

The crowd was on its feet.

"Oh, wow!"

"I've never seen boobs that big!"

"They can't be real!"

"Orihime's are bigger!"

"Time!" Isshin shouted. He waved to the Shinigami dugout. "Replacement shirt, please."

Hanataro jogged out, his cheeks flaming, with another uniform top in his hand. He handed it to Matsumoto with his eyes averted.

She took it from him with a chuckle. "You're such a sweetie, Hanataro." She patted his cheek, causing Hanataro to inadvertently look at her. His cheeks promptly got several shades redder.

"You're welcome!" he squeaked and dashed back to the dugout.

Matsumoto put the shirt on and leisurely fastened the buttons. "Well, that was unexpected." She smiled sweetly at Isshin. "I don't think that strike should count."

Isshin gave her an appreciative smile. "While I enjoyed the view, the strike still counts."

"Dang!" Matsumoto stepped back into the batter's box.

Grimmjow's next pitch did not have quite its usual speed and Matsumoto got a piece of it, but it bounced straight back to Grimmjow. He threw her out at first.

"Oh, shoot!" Matsumoto exclaimed. She jogged back to the dugout with nearly every eye pinned to her chest, eager to see how the new uniform would hold up.

"That's two away and the Shinigami are in danger of letting this one completely slip away," Urahara announced. "They are back at the top of their lineup, with Kurosaki Ichigo representing their last chance to pull this one out."

Ichigo slouched up to the plate. "So it's down to you and me, eh?" he said to Grimmjow. "This is your last chance to show you've got some big round ones in your sack."

Grimmjow held his tongue, but it obviously took a lot of effort. He pitched a fastball and Ichigo promptly smacked it right over Nnoitra's head. The ball bounced twice and then rolled straight to Wonderweiss.

"Wonderweiss!" Tousen shouted. "Throw the ball to Zommari!"

Wonderweiss blinked at the ball and then, to the complete astonishment of everyone, picked it up and rifled it straight at Zommari. Ichigo, who was about to round first, skidded to a stop and ran back to the base.

"Well, who would have imagined it?" Yoruichi exclaimed. "That skinny little Arrancar has an arm!"

"That was some throw," Urahara agreed. "But the hit keeps the Shinigami hopes alive and brings Hitsugaya to the plate. He's two for four with a home run. The Arrancar pitcher had better be careful."

"You're still in control, Grimmy," Gin said soothingly. "Just focus on the guy at the plate. Nothing else matters. He's the last out."

Grimmjow nodded and prepared to pitch. He went back to the knuckleball, but Hitsugaya wasn't fooled. He fouled off the first pitch, sending it high over the backstop and almost into the announcer's booth.

"Hitsugaya hit that one pretty hard," Urahara announced.

"But in the wrong direction," Yoruichi added. "I nearly caught it."

Hitsugaya fouled off the next pitch, too, sending it bouncing toward the Arrancar dugout. Ulquiorra watched without a change of expression as it bounced off the bench right beside him and rolled to the far end. Grimmjow scowled and shook off the next two signs. He accepted the third one, but then hesitated before starting his windup as Ichigo took a lead off first. He watched Ichigo for a second and then threw a curveball high and outside. Hitsugaya let it go by with a smirk.

"Ball one!"

Grimmjow took a deep breath, checked Ichigo again and tried to sneak one over the plate. Hitsugaya jumped all over it. He smoked the ball between Zommari and Tousen and Ichigo leaped over it as he ran for second. Stark scooped up the ball in stride and threw it in, holding the runners at first and second. The Shinigami fans were all on their feet.

"Way to go, Hitsugaya-taicho!"

"Great hit!"

"With runners at first and second," Urahara announced, "the Shinigami refuse to go down easy. Rukia started the game with a home run. Will the Arrancar risk that she might have another one in her?"

"Apparently not," Yoruichi said dryly.

Ulquiorra walked out to the mound with a thoughtful expression. "This female concerns me," he said to Grimmjow.

"I'm not afraid of her!" Grimmjow declared. "I've gotten her out before."

"But the odds are better with the next batter. He hasn't gotten a single hit."

Gin came out to the mound. "Ulquiorra makes a good point, Grimmy. Let's walk this one and go for the next batter."

"I'm not walking anyone!" Grimmjow responded hotly. "I can get her!"

"Are you saying you don't want to follow my recommendation?" Ulquiorra asked flatly.

Grimmjow flinched. He shook his glove at Ulquiorra. "I don't want to hear about it if this doesn't work!"

Ulquiorra returned to the dugout and Gin went back to the plate, but he remained standing. Scowling furiously, Grimmjow pitched four high, easy balls outside.

Kenpachi watched from the on-deck circle with a confused expression. "What are they doing?"

"Walking her," Renji replied. "They're worried she might get a solid hit, so they're not pitching to her." He grinned. "They'd rather pitch to you instead."

Kenpachi absorbed this for several heartbeats. "Wait a minute! Does that mean they're more scared of her than me?"

"Yup."

"That's… that's…" Kenpachi seemed unable to find words to express the outrage of such an insult. "I'm way more dangerous than she is!"

"Not in baseball."

Kenpachi smacked his bat on the ground. "That does it! I'm hitting a home run!"

"Ball four!" Isshin said as Gin caught the fourth pitch. "Take your base!"

Rukia tossed her bat toward the dugout and jogged to first. Hitsugaya and Ichigo advanced to second and third.

"Well, that's an interesting play," Urahara announced. "The Arrancar decline to pitch to Rukia and have loaded the bases with two outs. This could be a very clever move, as Kenpachi is hitless today."

Kenpachi stormed to the plate with wounded pride and fury darkening his face. He hunched over, his bat held high above his shoulder. Grimmjow tried a knuckleball and missed inside.

"Ball one!"

He tried another knuckleball and almost threw a wild pitch. Gin just barely managed to dig it out of the dirt before it scooted between his legs.

"Ball two!"

Grimmjow blew out his breath. He took his time preparing for the next pitch, checking all three runners before looking in for the sign. Then he went into a full windup. His arm whipped around in a blur of speed as he unloaded his best fastball.

Kenpachi crushed it. The ball sailed straight toward center field.

Yammi stared up at it unmoving. "That's high." He tilted his head to watch over his shoulder. "That's far."

The ball cleared the bleachers. There was the sound of breaking glass and a car alarm went off.

"Kenpachi hits a grand slam home run!" Urahara announced excitedly, but it was doubtful that anyone heard him. Every Shinigami fan in the park was screaming at the top of his or her longs. The entire 11th squad was leaping up and down in unison, chanting Kenpachi's name and waving the banner with his face on it.

Ichigo jogged home and waited for the others as they came around the bases. He high-fived with Hitsugaya and then both of them high-fived Rukia. By the time Kenpachi made it around the bases, though, the entire team was on the field and he got mobbed. His grin was so wide it appeared to wrap around behind his ears. It took Isshin some time to restore order.

"The game isn't over, folks!" Isshin said loudly. "Let's get back to business."

Yachiru climbed up to perch on Kenpachi's shoulder. "See! I said you could do it!" "She tugged on his cheek.

In the Arrancar dugout, Ulquiorra rubbed his chin. "That did not work out as expected."

"Well, Yoruichi," Urahara announced, "with one blow, the Shinigami have tied the game! I may have to send for more concessions if this goes into extra innings."

"I bet you planned this," Yoruichi accused.

"Who, me? I'm just the announcer."

"Never trust a man who hides his face under a hat," Yoruichi intoned.

"Next up is Renji," Urahara announced innocently, "who could be the winning run for the Shinigami."

As Renji approached the plate, Byakuya cleared his throat. Renji cringed.

"Abarai-san," Byakuya said. "Don't embarrass me."

Renji straightened his shoulders. "You can count on me, _taicho_." He stepped to the plate, his face resolute.

Grimmjow faced him, looking equally resolute. "No messing around," he muttered. "I'm finishing this." He pitched a fastball right down the middle. Renji swung a little late and fouled the ball down the right field line. A Hollow with very long arms caught it on the bounce right as it was entering the stands. Grimmjow nodded slightly. He wound up and threw the exact same pitch. Renji fouled it again, this time landing it cleanly in the stands on the right field side.

"What are you playing at, Grimmjow?!" Nnoitra snapped. "Just strike him out!"

"Shut the hell up!" Grimmjow snapped back. "You'll wreck my concentration!" He glared at Renji and wound up for another pitch. He snuck in a breaking ball, but Renji didn't go for it. It was low.

"Ball one!"

Grimmjow took a step back and tucked his glove under his arm. He picked up the talc bag and dried his hands, never taking his eyes off Renji. He dropped the bag, put his glove back on and leaned in for the sign. Then he took a full windup. The fastball blazed in, heading right down the middle of the strike zone. Renji swung and cracked the ball down the right field line. For a moment, it looked like it was going to go foul, but then it curved in and dropped just inside the right field line.

"Fair ball!" Isshin shouted.

"What?!" Grimmjow screamed.

"Really?!" Stark echoed. He bolted after the ball, which was rolling all the way to the corner.

"Touch it, touch it!" a Hollow fan shouted. "It'll be ruled a ground rule double!"

"That's cheating!" several Shinigami seated in the corner screamed and they piled onto the nearest Hollows to make sure no such thing happened.

In the meantime, Renji was tearing around the bases with his head down, pouring on all the speed he had without actually resorting to flash steps.

"Stark, you lazy bastard!" Grimmjow screamed. "Move it!"

Stark skidded into the corner, attempting to grab the ball and turn around at the same time. He subsequently lost his footing and slid into the wall with a bang. A Hollow leaned over the wall, reaching out for Stark and the ball, and three Shinigami grabbed him by various appendages, yanking him back. The Hollow yelped in pain and a half-dozen Hollows came to his aid, prompting an equal number of Shinigami to jump in as well. Stark scrambled to his feet and heaved the ball in as Renji was rounding third and pushing for home. Zommari fielded the throw on the bounce, whirled and rifled it home. Renji dove for the plate head first with his arms fully extended. He slid into the plate in a cloud of dust just as Gin caught the ball right next to his outstretched hands. Isshin leaned over them and the dust cloud raised by Renji's slide obscured him, Renji, Gin, the plate and the ball.

"What happened?"

"Is he safe?"

"I can't see a damn thing!"

Infuriated shouts rained down from every side and the fight that started in the corner began to spread. A flash of bright blue light shot out of somewhere and a whole section of Hollows was blown to smithereens.

"Who shot that lightning bolt?" Luppi demanded. "No one is supposed to be using special powers!"

In response, a Hollow with a gaping mouth big enough to eat a small car whole demonstrated his prowess by chomping down on five unfortunate Shinigami and the seats they were occupying.

"What the hell?" A Shinigami who had just avoided being consumed with his peers, whipped out his _zanpakuto_ and beheaded the offending Hollow. The situation deteriorated rapidly from there. A whole series of explosions collapsed the right field bleachers. Somebody's _shikai_ attack opened a giant rift in the left field stands and several Hollows disappeared into the gap.

"Stop this nonsense at once!" Genryūsai screamed from his luxury box. An instant later, the entire box disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

"I've always wanted to do that," Szayel snickered. Then he dove aside with a startled shriek as one of Ikkaku's giant _bankai_ blades split open the ground where he'd been standing.

"Dang, I missed!" Ikkaku grumbled. "Maybe I'll get this one!" And he swung his blade at Nnoitra.

Nnoitra jumped backward and whipped out his blade. "You're no match for my strength!"

Interestingly enough, while all this was going on, Renji, Gin and Isshin hadn't moved. And then a ball of red fire exploded directly behind them, blasting the backstop into deadly shreds of twisted wire shrapnel, and all three of them went flying.

"OK, THAT'S IT!" Isshin shouted at the top of his lungs when he rolled to his feet. "Everyone stop what you're doing this instant!"

Throughout the stands, Hollows and Shinigami alike paused in mid-attack.

Isshin stood with his hands on his hips and surveyed the damage. "Well, I can honestly say I have no idea if Renji was safe or not. So the game is a tie, on account of we can't play any extra innings in this mess."

"WHAT?!"

"You can't have a tie in baseball," Ulquiorra pointed out, quite reasonably, he thought. "We're supposed to keep playing until someone wins."

Isshin rather pointedly looked around. Smoking craters ate up big chunks of the outfield. The right field bleachers were obliterated and the debris covered the parts of right field that were not gaping holes. The left field stands were cracked apart like a broken egg carton. Part of the announcer's booth hung over open space. The VIP luxury boxes were on fire. The remaining parts of the stands that were not on fire were caked with ice and snow from various attacks.

"Where do you presume to play these extra innings?"

"Hmm..."

"We could just toss a coin," Ganju suggested.

"NO!" everyone screamed. "WE WON!"

-o-o-o-o-o-

_So who won? We ain't tellin'! You'll just have to wait for the rematch!_


End file.
